The Wayward plan of Professor X
by Cajun Charmer
Summary: Bubs and Bubbettes, used to be. The time has finally arrived... The Professor has always had a secret plan, a motive never revealed. But now. He chooses to show his true colours, and how far he is willing to go to see them reach completion. In a silly way
1. The Meeting, and Logan's First Day

**Logan Goes Back to School**

****

_People are NOT objects. You can NOT own them. I am no different, I don't own anyone, especially not the X-men. Promise._

It was a normal day, sun was shining, trees were waving in the breeze, and all the children were out having a marvellous time. It was a happy day. Everyone was happy.

"Holy mother of CRAP!"

Everybody looked wide eyed at Logan, he had a letter in his right hand, his left was getting ready to carve it to bits.

"Logan, we don't need any of that BLOODY language in this institute!" Shouted the Professor. The students all looked as the professor wheeled his way towards Logan.

"Now, what seems to be the problem?" Xavier asked, putting his hands together.

"Well, you see, my IQ isn't the highest it could be Professor and…." Logan looked around, everyone was listening.

"Go on, Logan, I promise I won't laugh" The Professor nodded. Logan leaned forward and whispered a figure into the Professor's ear. A slight grin appeared on Xavier's face. He bit his lip.

"So, you can see the embarrassing situation I'm in" Logan pleaded, holding the letter.

"Yes, I need time to think on this" Professor looked thoughtfully into the distance.

"You won't tell anyone about…y'know?" Logan rubbed the back of his neck.

'No of course not" Logan left the room. As soon as he was gone, the professor called a meeting.

_At the meeting!_

"We're all here to discuss Logan's ridiculously low IQ!" The Professor said.

"Great….." There was a dead silence; it lasted almost five minutes, maybe more.

"What is there, like, to discuss?" Kitty asked, getting up. The Professor drew a gun and shot Kitty dead. She fell to the floor with a thud. Everyone looked wide-eyed down at her body.

"Professor…. You…you shot her" Storm stuttered out, still looking down at her body.

"Relax, they're duds" The Professor said, holding up his gun.

"No they're not" Scott said simply.

"Oh" The Professor said, slightly startled.

"You killed mein Katzchen…" Kurt stuttered out.

"Well, let's not sit around playing the blame game" The Professor said innocently

"I'm calling zhe police" Kurt got up and was just about to Tele-port, but with The Professor's quick ass thinking….

BANG

Another body fell to the floor…Everyone looked down on it, wide-eyed still.

"Professor? Vhy did you shoot Evan?" Kurt asked, confused.

"He looked at me funny" The Professor looked around "Oh…and he left the toilet seat up"

"No, that was me" Ray said, rubbing the back of his neck.

"Really?" The Professor asked, scowling.

"Yeah, ya see…."

BANG

A third body fell to the floor.

"Anyone else leave the toilet seat up?" The Professor asked pointing the gun at the crowd of people. Who all shook their heads in unison.

"Great, now, let's all sit down" All the x-men went back to their places. "Oh, Amara you don't have to"

BANG

"Now on with the meeting".

Everyone continued talking very excitedly, for long hours they discussed different combinations, and after hours and hours of debating….

"So, we're decided then?" The Professor asked.

"Yeah, I think so," Scott said looking down the long thin table at everybody.

"Alright then" The Professor picked up the phone and dialled a number "Hello? Yes, we want a three cheese and pepperoni pizza, three garlic breads and a family sized coke" The Professor put down the phone. "Now that the food is on its way, lets talk about Logan"

"When will it get here?" Scott asked.

"Well it's six o'clock now, so six-fifteen"

Long hours of discussion took place, hours and hours of long dreary discussion, hours and hours, hours hours, hour upon hour went by, long hours hours, always hours. Never a stop! NO! The HOURS always are here, always with the hours, and the discussion and the discussion and the hours! THE HOURS!

"What's the time?" Scott asked.

"Two minutes past six" The Professor answered, looking at his pocket watch.

"So, Logan is going back to Kindergarten?" Storm asked, holding the letter in one hand.

"That's a great idea!" Scott shouted.

"Where do you get your ideas?" Kurt asked in astonishment.

"Well, it says he is in the letter" Storm said pointing at the letter.

Then there was knock at the door.

"I'll get it," The Professor said, wheeling to the front door. Everyone listened closely.

"Hey here's your pizza, dude" They could hear from the hallway.

"Yes how much is it?" The professor asked politely.

"$9.50, dude" The delivery guy answered.

"Let me just get my…" BANG!

From the meeting room everyone was wide-eyed again. The Professor wheeled back into the room.

"Pizza is here!"

"Professor…you can't just shoot your problems away," Scott said, patting the Professor's shoulder.

"Oh yeah!" The Professor pointed his gun at Scott's head. Scott quickly sat back down.

The pizza was quickly eaten, and then, they went on with the meeting.

"So it's agreed, Logan is going to Kindergarten, forever!" The Professor laughed diabolically.

"Are you alright?" Sam asked.

"Are you suggesting I'm crazy?" Asked the Professor.

"No, I just…"

BANG

"Well I am! I'm completely out of my tiny little mind" He looked around the room.

"Does anyone else think I'm not crazy?"

Jubilee raised her hand

BANG

"Be honest!" The Professor urged.

Bobby and Jamie raised their hands.

BANG BANG

'Excellent, well, back to the meeting' The Professor slotted his gun in a holster on his ankle, then wheeled to the table once more.

'Well, Professor, what else is there to discuss?' Jean asked, kind of nervously, considering.

'If I weren't such a lazy man' The professor started, narrowing his eyes 'I'd get my gun back out'

Jean quickly sat back down, and kept her mouth shut. The survivors of the Professor's rather sadistic outburst looked around the room nervously. They looked around the room with uncertain eyes, and a VERY awkward silence filled the room. Beast raised his hand.

'Yes, Hank?'

'Can I have the last piece of pizza?' He asked, his hand still in the air. There was another silence while the Professor contemplated. My, my, he enjoyed contemplating.

'Doctor McCoy, Beast, Henry, Harry, Hank' The Professor laughed 'I have just been contemplating, as I do, and, came across a slight epiphany' He smiled 'You see, if you have the last piece of pizza, which you so nicely asked for, then I cannot. So you see…'

BANG

Hank's now inanimate body fell to the floor, and the Professor helped himself to the pizza that remained in the box. He took a bite and chewed continually, slowly getting angrier as it went around his mouth.

'It's cold' He spoke through clenched teeth, and breathed heavily though his nose, everyone look wide eyed with anticipation, he was going to do something mean, they could tell, but, quite calmly, the professor placed the pizza on the table, breathed in and out, put his fingers together.

Everyone let out a sigh of relief, then, quite suddenly; the Professor drew his gun and shot the pizza.

BANG

The pizza exploded in a cloud of powdered cheese and tomato sauce. A piece of pepperoni landed on the Professor's head and his eyes swelled with uncontrollable rage.

'I'm so angry!' He yelled.

BANG: Down fell poor silent Roberto.

BANG: There goes Rahne.

BANG: And the team's new cat, Biggles, went up to kitty heaven.

The professor kept firing, but he, luckily, was out of ammunition. He placed the gun in his holster again, and continued with the meeting. The slice of pepperoni still on his head.

'Meeting' He breathed in heavily 'Adjourned' and out it came.

Everyone walked, or more precisely, slowly ran out of the room, looking behind them carefully. 'Well, there was only so much time before he cracked' Scott said, leaning on the fireplace.

'Vell, at least ve don't have to vorry about him ever again' Kurt said, also leaning on the mantle.

'Yep…what?' Scott asked, confused. 'Yes we do, this is HIS house, he could creep into our rooms and kill us all in our sleep'

'Oh, Scottie, don't be so negative' Jean said, smiling, leaning on the mantle piece. 'Don't you see that maybe the Professor has a perfect reason to kill the students'

Meanwhile, in the Professor's study… 

'Charles, why did you kill all the students?' Storm asked, quite aware of the dangers.

'No reason' The Professor said coolly, polishing his gun.

'Where did you even get that thing?' Storm asked again.

'I bought it, at Primart'

'Oh'

Meanwhile, at Primart… 

Irene Adler walked up to the counter, cane in hand and leant on it.

'I'd like a gun please' She said coolly, smiling heroically.

'Sorry, love, sold out' The shop assistant replied.

'Oh, dang!' And with that, Irene walked out of the shop.

Back in the foyer… 

By now, everyone was leaning on the mantle piece discussing things about the afternoon meeting.

'So, Logan's gone crazy, and, the Professor's going back to Kindergarten?' Asked Forge, who turned up a little late.

'No…No, that's completely wrong, Just go home, you dumbass' Scott said, rudely.

'Oh' Forge wiped away a tear, got off the mantle piece and solemnly and slowly walked away to the front door.

'Moron' Scott said under his breath.

'Soooooo' Said Jean 'Logan's going back to Kindergarten then?'

Just as Jean said that, Logan walked past, eating processed burger cheese slices, and overheard her.

'Where did you hear that? Who told you? It's all vicious lies! Vicious I tells ya! Vicious! AHHH!' Logan fell to his knees hitting the floor and squeezing his cheese into liquefied goo.

'Logan it's okay, we don't care that you're stupid' Rogue sympathetically patted Logan's shoulder.

'Hey, Rogue' Scott said 'Where the hell have you been all through this fic?'

'What?' She asked, raising an eyebrow.

Scott stood their, looking around at everyone 'I don't know' He put his hand to his head 'I think my mind got in touch with this alternate universe for a second, it was weird, people had concepts of '3D' objects. And with strange powers wrote long, sometimes really sad, stories about our lives'

'Scott, we all know that the third dimension is a complete myth' Jean said smugly.

'I know'

'Weird'

There was a long silence.

'I squished my cheese' Logan said sadly.

'Never mind' Jean said nicely 'We'll get you some more'

'Logan, it says in the letter you're going back tomorrow' Scott said, reading the letter.

'Yep' Logan sighed 'It might be fun'

'But it probably von't be' Kurt crossed his arms and nodded.

Logan looked to the floor sadly and sniffed.

'Logan, I know something that might cheer you up' Scott smiled.

'Yeah?'

'The Professor's gone crazy' Scott started 'He killed all the new students, Kitty, Hank, this pizza guy, Evan'

'Evan?'

'Yeah Evan, and Biggles' Scott said.

'Not Biggles?' Logan looked sad again.

'I'm afraid so'

'Oh'

'You better not be discussing things!' The professor shouted from the top of the stairs.

'We're not Professor'

Outside the School, the next day… 

'Be careful now, don't get into fights, don't swear at the teachers, and cut down on the smoking and drinking' Storm said in a motherly tone, before ruffling his hair and pinching his cheek.

'You don't need to patronise me, 'Ro' He said straightening his hair out.

'Hey, Mr. Logan, I made you a packed lunch' Jean said, passing him a brown paper bag.

'Yay!' He took the bag and looked inside it 'Processed cheese, how did you know, red?'

'I had a feeling' Jean also ruffled his hair and joined Storm.

'Hey, Logan, I got you this' Scott passed a yellow book to him 'I thought you might need it'

''How to stop wreaking damage for dummies' Thanks Cyke' Logan hugged the book. And Scott joined the two gals.

'Is the Professor not coming?' Logan asked, looking sad once again.

'He was busy' Scott smiled 'Sorry, man'

'Oh' Logan sighed and walked into class.

'Poor guy' Scott said 'The Professor should be here, Logan's really disappointed'

'Yeah, he's being very neglectful' Jean agreed.

_Logan's Fist day…._

'Okay class, let's give our new classmate a huge, warm welcome, come in Logan' Mrs Rivers said, calling out the door. Logan walked in embarrassingly a cigar in his mouth, keeping his head down. The little kids just stared at him; jaws dropped and eyes wide.

'Come on Logan, say hello' Mrs Rivers Urged.

'Yo, bubs' He nodded to the kids 'Toots' He nodded to the teacher.

'Come on kids, give him a big welcome'

The kids just stared at him.

'What the hell is it?' He asked.

'Oh yes, Logey'

'What? What a bad pet name'

'Logey, just spit' Mrs Rivers held out her hand.

Logan looked around in confusion 'Uh, miss'

'Logan, just do it'

'Okay…but'

'LOGAN!'

Logan spat his cigar out, along with some gum he was chewing. The teacher smiled.

'Thank you' She looked down at the smouldering cigar on her hand 'AHHHHHHH!' She pushed the door open and ran to the teacher's lounge quickly, Leaving Logan standing awkwardly in front of gaping faces.

'So, I'm Logan' he looked at his time table and leant over to a little boy who had his hair combed neatly into a side parting, polished shoes and very definite resentment toward the other kids of the class.

'Uh, where do I sit?' Logan asked quietly.

'Oh, over there, all the new students sit on that table for the first few days' He smiled smugly and placed his hands in his lap.

'Oh?' Logan raised an eyebrow.

'My name's Chester by the way. My dad's rich and he's sending me to private school as soon as possible'

'Oh…Great'

'I used to have braces, but my new dentist said that I looked after them so well that I could take them off' He smiled smugly again 'He offered me a lollypop but I declined. I said to him 'What kind of dentist gives away lollypops?''

'Right'

'I raise both my hands in class, just so there's more of a probability she'd pick me. I know all the answers to every question. I should be moved ahead, but there's no room in the forward class. So I have ton keep 'Learning' with these deadbeats'

'How old are you?'

'Four and three eighths' He smiled the annoying smile. 'My father said just because I'm young is no excuse for ignorance…What's your excuse?'

'Grrr' Logan growled and walked over to his seat, it stood barely one foot off the floor. Logan sighed and sat down on it. He put his packed lunch on the desk in front of him and placed his book right in the middle of it.

'I tend to read more imaginative pieces' said a little lispy voice from behind him. Logan turned around. It was Chester, smiling his smile.

'Oh, god' Logan said under his breath, and turned to face the chalkboard again.

'I've read every book by Hardy, I especially liked 'Tess of the Durbivilles', I thought he put across the mayoralty and maturity of Tess's Character very well'

'I've read every book in the Harry Potty series'

'Pfft, have you read Treasure Island?'

'No'

'I didn't like it, to short for one thing, and the fights were drawn out and there were too many pirates'

'Do you like Harry Potter?'

'Tut, pfft, What about The Catcher in the Rye? I though it was very well written, such a perceptive and understandable imagination'

'Not a fan of Harry Potter then?'

'No'

'Is there something wrong with you?'

'I did come out with a very bad rash on my stomach some years ago, it turned out I was allergic to nuts'

'Yes then.'

Chester sat down on chair next to him, and placed his hands in his lap. Logan looked across slowly, wide eyed.

'Don't you sit…over there' Logan pointed to Chester's old seat.

'I have a special privilege. As long as a chair free I am, as the most mature student, to sit in it if I please'

'Great' Logan murmured.

'We're doing colouring in today, matching numbers to colours'

'Really? That sounds fun' Logan sat up, perking up a bit.

'I find it dreadfully dull. It only goes up to five and there are only five colours. After you colour in the balloon, the present, the cat, the tree and the post-box, it's learning capabilities sort of dwindle'

'Oh'

'Though for your, obviously challenged mind, it might be a bit of a rush, I'll help you if you want me to' He smiled.

Logan closed his eyes and breathed calmly.

'Only if the Teacher says it's okay of course. Otherwise it's cheating'

'Could you, just, give me a little space?' Logan shifted away from his slightly.

'Tomorrow we-' Chester shifted his desk towards Logan, now even closer than before 'Tomorrow we're doing the alphabet, I leant it before I even came here mind. It was oh so simple. I decided after that to read up on grammar and punctuation. Learnt that in a jiffy. And. By the end of the week, I could construct complicated paragraphs'

He smiled.

'Uh-huh' Logan mumbled and banged his head on the desk and kept it there.

Mrs. Rivers entered the classroom, a bandage wrapped around her hand and a rather impatient look on her face.

'Okay class, now I want you to fix yourselves up with study partners' She looked over at Logan 'Logan, why don't you go with Chester. He's a very smart boy and he'll get you settled in' She sat down on her wheely-chair, looked around the room and took a swig of an unidentified drink'

Logan looked at it and sighed.

'Why don't I come round your house after school, I'm sure I could assist you with the colour-by-numbers'

Logan buried his face in his hands and whimpered.

_I will write more, if give the right insentive. So review if you want to, and you'll get some more of my rather witty writings. If not then, don't dis my work, I have very little self-confidence. I may have a nervous break down Looks from side to side _


	2. JOTT and well, ROMY

_I know, I know. I hardly got any reviews, but, I enjoy writing this, okay? PS. and I don't own any of X-men, not that I no of anyway._

_At the Institute…_

'Professor! I am shocked and appalled at your behavior!' Storm shouted at the Professor, who was looking intimidated, his hands held up in defense.

'What? What did I do?' The Professor asked.

'You didn't say goodbye to him this morning, before he went to school' Storm folded her arms and looked cross 'He was very upset'

'Storm, I do have a life outside my Logan' Professor said, in his defense.

'He's craving for your attention' Storm knelt down in front of the Professor 'He tried to talk with you the other day, and you just pretended he wasn't there'

'I'm incredibly busy! I'm sorry if Logan isn't first priority at the moment'

'But killing the students is?'

'Oh!' The Professor roared 'So now it's about my homicidal behavior?'

'It's always been about your homicidal behavior, Charles!' Storm shed a tear and got up again 'It always has'

The Professor sighed apologetically, and wheeled closer to her.

'Listen' He started 'maybe I have spent too much time thinking up disturbing, yet humorous ways to kill people'

Storm looked round, her tear stained cheeks very prominent, her eyes like puppy dog eyes.

'Oh, Storm, don't look at me like that' He looked away 'It's bloody sickening'

'You always make these promises, Charles, and you never keep them!'

'What? I-'

'It's almost like you make them only TOO break them!'

'Ororo, if I promise to spend more time with Logan, then I'll spend more time with him!'

There was a long silence, Storm was contemplating.

'Charles' Storm turned 'If you don't, and I have to see his sunken little face again, I will make you pay!'

'Okay'

'Okay'

Storm headed for the door, and just as she turned the door handle.

CLICK

Storm turned around very slowly, only to face the professor with his gun pointed at her, the trigger pulled back.

'Do you think I would let you talk to me in that way?' The Professor asked wheeling toward her.

'Well….yes?' Storm asked her hands in the air.

'Well…you're wrong'

'Oh' Storm lowered her head 'Damn'

'Say your prayers'

'Charles! Um...' She contemplated again 'Um, Professor, I've just been contemplating-'

'WHAT?' The Professor screamed 'That's it!'

'I'm begging!' She fell to her knees 'Please, I have so much to live for!'

'Man, you sissy' the Professor tutted. 'It's enough to make a man to turn away in disgust'

'So, you're not going to shoot me?'

'Oh, no, you got me all wrong'

BANG

'I love it when they beg'

_Meanwhile, in Scott's room…_

'Is this really such a good idea?' Jean asked, scratching her head.

'Yeah, man, it seems a bit-'

'Crazy?' Scott asked, pulling the trigger of the power drill.

'No…extreme' Kurt finished.

'We have to prepare ourselves' Scott placed a screwdriver horizontally between his teeth 'Ee av do bepar fo en de bufessa gus aazy gain' (Read it out loud)

'Ja, but, vhy now?'

'Ya'll actually understand what he's blaverin' on about?' Rogue asked.

'Ja, didn't you?' Kurt looked confused.

'No, I didn't understand what in tarnation he was blaverin' on about' Rogue paused for a minute 'ya'll'

Scott finished his drilling, and looked up in frustration, taking the screwdriver out of his mouth.

'Kurt, stop being so smug. Rogue, stop being so southern. Jean, stop being so…tall.' Scott turned away.

'What about me?' Danielle asked.

'What in tarnation! Who, in Louisiana Christ's name, are you?' Rogue asked, startled 'ya'll'

'I'm Danielle' She stared at the blank faces of the surrounding crowd. 'Danielle Moonstar. The Indian that Kitty rescued from drowning'

'…Forge?' Kurt asked.

'No. Danielle Moonstar. I make people's dreams go out of control' She looked sad 'Don't you remember?'

'Judging by your uniform, you're one of the new mutants' Scott got up and looked at her closely 'How come you weren't shot this morning?'

'Well, as soon as he shot Kitty…I ran' She said. 'Didn't anyone else?'

'We're not all as smart as you, little Miss, 'I'm too good for the bayou' prissy pants' Rogue ranted 'Ya'll'

'Rogue shut up' Scott placed a hand on Danielle's shoulder 'We need your help'

_Three minutes later…_

'I'm not jumping out the window, we're on the third floor' Danielle argued.

'Worst comes to worst, you'll crack your spine' Scott said easily.

'Or my head' Danielle added.

'Well…you _could_ break anything' Jean said.

'How is that an argument _for _jumping out the window?'

'Listen' Scott walked over to Danielle 'Shut up'

'Scott, just continue doing mindless DIY' Rogue said 'Ya'll'

'Fine!' Scott picked up his screwdriver and started working again, mumbling some insulting remarks on southerners.

'So…' Jean looked around 'Twister?'

'No' Scott said 'Twister sucks'

'You always say that, every time I wanna play twister' Jean pouted, and leant against the wall.

'You wanna know why?' Scott asked, not looking up from his work 'Because it sucks'

'….Monopoly'

'Sucks'

'Danielle, you like twister?' Kurt asked.

'Sure, why not?'

'Because it sucks' Scott added.

'Would you stop being so mindlessly rude?' Jean asked 'You're putting me off this whole security thing'

'Do you want to be safe, or dead?' Scott asked 'Because if so, you'd be safer outside'

'Is that a threat?' Jean asked pointing at him.

'So what if it is?' He asked, putting down his screwdriver.

'I'll hate you'

'I hate you already'

'Screw you!'

'Yeah, you suck!'

'So do you!' They met each other's gaze, and kissed passionately.

'I love you Scott'

'I love you Jean'

'Let's never fight again'

'Right, agreed'

'I love you SO much'

'Dtto'

'Would you shut the hell up?' Danielle asked.

Scott and Jean went back to their respective places, and no more words were said on the subject.

'Finished!' Scott shouted.

'It's about time, you been spendin' Louisiana Christ knows how long on that' Rogue said 'Ya'll'

With a dark, evil look from Scott, Rogue sat down, and shut up.

'Great, what exactly have you done, man?'

'Well, I rigged it so not a single person can get in or out without getting' horribly killed! HA HA HA ha ha ha ha ha…….ha ha ha…ha...ha…...' Scott lowered his head and sighed 'Damn'

_The Institute Foyer… _

'My. Storm's body was sure heavy' The Professor said, cleaning his hands with a cloth.

'Storm, help us, Kurt got us trapped in my room!' Came a voice from upstairs.

'Well. This looks like a job for…Superman' The Professor looked around 'Well, he's not here, looks like they're screwed' The Professor wheeled out of the room.

The door opened, and Logan stepped through it, with a little kid following close behind him.

'Well, this here, is the foyer, in there is the dining room, and the kitchen is through that way-'

'I think I can learn the layout of this establishment quite well whilst I walk about it. I don't need you're assistance.' Chester said, taking his shoes off and placing them by the door.

'Well, okay' Logan said, walking after Chester who was already clambering up the stairs sensibly.

'Someone is screaming' Chester said looking down the corridor 'I believe it's coming from this room here'

'Yeah, there's always some kind of horrid thing going on round here, my advice to you, learn to not care' Logan said calmly.

'Well, apparently they're stuck inside that room' Chester said.

'Help us little boy!' Scott screamed through the door.

'Who in tarnation…' The voice was hurriedly cut off by loud crashing sound.

'Please. As you can…hear…we're turning against each other'

'My father said not to talk to strangers, and what's more you sound like a jolly awful and dull lot' Chester said, smiling smugly.

'God' Logan said under his breath.

'Listen you little snot nosed brat, just push the door open' Scott screamed.

'Oh, 'little snot nosed brat' I find your insults very immature and rather unoriginal, I neither care for you, or feel for your situation'

'You're not gonna help us then?'

'It seems to me…'

'Get out the way kid' Logan said, pushing Chester out the way, and unsheathing his claws. Logan kicked the door down, and a sad little bucket of water fell to the floor, missing Logan's head.

'You bypassed my tricks and traps' Scott said, as he kneeled 'You should be the new team leader, if you weren't so monumentally stupid. I mean, did you have to _break _my door?'

'That is what I was thinking. It would have been much more sensible to just turn the handle' Chester said smiling.

'Yeah. What the kid said' Scott nodded.

'You're no Socrates either. Was that bucket of water what you were so scared of?' Chester complained.

'Well…'

'Is Rogue unconscious?' Logan asked, pointing to her body.

'Yes.'

'Why?'

'Because she keeps saying stereotypical southern sayings' Scott smiled 'Try saying that ten times over'

And everyone did.

_Ten times later…_

'Sceriahypical sa'n saings, sayhical sa'n saings sayhic-'

'This is a pointless and rather demeaning activity' Jean said, pouting in the corner.

'Just because you're crap' Scott smiled back at her 'I mean, Doris here lasted longer than you'

'Danielle'

'Twisters more my game' Jean moaned 'I'm good at Twister'

'Twister sucks'

'Shut up'

'Yes. Do.' Chester said, with an 'I'm-above-all-this-but-I'm-to-polite-to-say-so' look on his face.

'Yo. Charlie'

'Chester'

'Yo. Chester. Up yours' Jean shouted, giving him the finger.

'Jean! He's four years old!' Logan said.

'Four and three eighths' Chester corrected him, his face still looking slightly constipated.

'Up yours' Logan murmured.

Rogue moaned a little, and everyone turned their attention to her. She was soon out again, and everyone went on with their lives.

'Would all please keep your voices down!' The Professor snapped; wheeling passed the door. Scott let out a girlish scream and hid under the bed.

'Yo' Logan said.

'Hello Logan. You're not about to go all 'lovey dovey because I'm taking notice of you', are you?' The Professor asked; his hand ready on his gun.

'No'

'Good' The Professor sighed and took his hand off it.

'You must be The Professor of the Institute' Chester said, holding out his hand for him to shake 'I am Chester Griffin, of the famous Griffin family; it's nice to meet you'

The Professor backed away, a rather scared look on his face.

'My father said he would send me to a private school like this one' Chester said 'Apparently any time soon, maybe to this one'

'I wouldn't bet on it' The Professor said.

'He's here to help me with my homework' Logan said.

'Homework?' asked Scott nervously from under his bed.

'Yeah. Colourin' in' Logan said, happily.

'Sounds fun' Jean added.

'I find it dull, there are only five colours you see-'

'Shut up' The Professor snapped. Chester did his famous 'polite' look again.

'I find you all very disturbing today. I'm going to polish my gun' The Professor started to wheel away, but he reversed quickly 'Who are you?' He asked, looking sternly at Danielle.

'I'm Danielle, I-'

'Get out of my house'

'But…'

'Go on, out!'

Danielle slowly walked out the room, and then out the front door.

'Bloody trespassers, they're all communists' the Professor left mumbling.

'Well' Chester said, clapping his hands together 'Which room's mine?'

'Excuse me?'

_At dinner…_

'It was very nice for you to cook for once professor' Scott said, eating a spoonful of something red.

'There's a hair in mine' Logan said lifting something small out of his bowl.

'Oh…um…that must be one of mine' The Professor said looking from side to side.

'There's another one' Logan said, lifting something else out.

'It looks more like some sort of fur' Jean said, examining a separate one she found in her bowl.

'Hey professor, how come you're not having any?' Kurt asked.

'Um…allergic'

'To what?'

'Cats…and other things' The Professor said, looking a little bit more nervous.

'Professor, what the hell is this?'

'Um…you know Biggles?' The Professor started, putting his hands together.

'…Yes?'

'It's defiantly _not _him'

The team pushed away their bowls, except for Kurt, who was convinced.

'So, Logan, how was your first day at school?' Jean asked.

'It could have been better' He said looking across at Chester 'It was okay, I suppose'

'Anything special happen?' Scott asked

'Well, I got sent to the Time Out Corner' Logan admitted; looking down at his red mush.

'Oh no, why?' The Professor asked.

'Swearing. And drinking. And Smoking' Logan said.

'Logan, I expected better from you' Jean said, shaking her head.

'Don't worry, it won't happen again'

There was a silence.

'Chester…how are you?' Scott asked, trying to break the ice.

'Adequate'

'oh'

'Do you all just live like this, everyday the same?' Chester started 'It seems rather dull to me'

'Well' Scott looked around 'We used to have disco nights'

'Discos are for adolescent morons who have nothing better to do then to try and act 'hip'' Chester said 'I'm above discos, my father says'

'I like discos'

'Do you like Twister?' Jean asked hopefully.

'It's worse than discos' Chester nodded, smiling 'It's all too…'common'…for me'

'Are you implying I'm common?' Jean asked; a little offended.

'A person never implies anything themselves, the implications, if you will, are made by the listeners' Chester nodded knowingly again.

'I'm not common'

'Hmpf' Chester said, smiling his smile.

'He makes enemies easily' Logan whispered to Jean, who wasn't fully listening.

'Do have some sort of stick shoved up your-' Scott started, but was cut off.

'I like 'bamfing'' Kurt said 'I find it fun'

'Bamfing?' Chester asked 'I'm not familiar with this?'

'Oh, mein gott, it's great, you should try it sometime' Kurt laughed 'It's teleporting, it's great for the soul'

'It's sounds dreadfully dull' Chester looked round the table 'Is that all you do, go to discos, play twister and…'bamf'?'

'I don't do any of those things' The Professor said.

'I know YOU wouldn't professor, you have the scent of someone that knows things' Chester rushed.

'Listen, you strange shrunken adult. I don't want to talk to you' The Professor said. 'I find you…peculiar'

'Oh. I know no one in this house could actually in some way be…intellectual' Chester contemplated. 'I've just been contemplating, and-'

'What?'

'and-'

'No, before that'

'I've been contem-'

BANG

'No one contemplates but me, got it!' The Professor shouted across the table. The five remaining mutants nodded, except for rogue, who was still unconscious in Scott's room. The was another silence.

'Professor. I think I'm gonna need some help with my homework now' Logan said.

'Alright, man!' Kurt screamed 'I found zhe prize!' Kurt took a little blue collar out of his mouth.

'Alright, dude, what does it say?' Scott asked.

'Please return to Xavier's school for the gifted' Kurt read out.

There was another eerie silence.

'Well, I'm off to bed' Xavier said, yawning.

'I need to get up early' Logan said 'for school'

'And I…er-' Scott left the room.

'So, Kurt…goodnight' Jean got up and left the room.

'Vas it something I said?'

The Professor came back in quickly.

'That's got to be the worst end of scene one-liner I've ever heard' He whined.

'Life isn't an entertaining cartoon series, Professor, and I'm not the funny foreign comic relief!'

Kurt shouted back, and left the room.

'Oh, he'll get his comeuppance' The Professor said to himself 'Oh yes he will'

_Next Morning…_

Wolverine was sitting at the kitchen table, eating his 'Super Her-O's' happily, smiling warmly to himself. Jean was at the stove making scrambled eggs, and occasionally, she'd look over at Logan and be proud. Scott was reading a newspaper, and once or twice, he would lower the pages just to see Logan happy. Kurt was eating some toast, and you could see, he would stop sometimes and smile to himself when seeing Logan so happy. Rogue, well, she didn't. And Chester was dead.

'Hey, Logan, did you manage to do all your homework?' Scott asked, gently folding up his paper.

'Yeah, Jean helped me with it yesterday' He leant back on his chair 'Thank you, Jean'

'Well, that's nice' Scott smiled.

'We then played Twister, didn't we Logan?' Jean asked.

'But it sucks' Scott butted it.

'Yeah, it was fun'

'Fun in a sucky way?' Scott asked.

'No' Logan looked confused 'Just generally enjoyable'

'Pfft. Whatever' Scott unfolded his newspaper and hid his face again.

'Hey, Kurt, did you take care of Chester's body?' Jean asked.

'Ja' Kurt nodded.

'…Okay…what did you do with it?'

'Um…vell-'

'Kurt, if I walk into the dining room right now, is Chester's body still going to be there?' Jean said, tapping her foot impatiently on the floor.

'No'

'I'm going to ask you again. If I walk into the dining room right now, is Chester's body still going to be there?'

'Yes'

Jean sighed and went into the dining room.

'Kurt, you are so lazy' Scott said.

'Shut up, man!'

'Hello hello hello' Came a new voice from the doorway. The X-men turned around to face, what looked like a military man, from England. His cap was green, with a red ribbon tied tightly around it. His coat was long and green, with golden buttons fastened to it, his moustache and beard were prominently ginger, and he had an army generals cane held under his arm. There were a large amount of medals attached to his breast pocket, and very large golden badge read. 'Maj. Romy.'

'Major Romy!' The X-men all shouted.

_Ha! Bet Ya'll didn't expect that now, did ya! So, till next time here's a little preveiw:_

_'Hey, Scott, come and help me with Chester's body!' Jean called from the dining room._

_'Hey, what?' Major Romy asked, in a very English accent._

_'Um… Chester's our dog. He died yesterday, poor guy' Scott quickly said._


	3. The Plot Thickens

_Hey…yeah I know, not many reviews again, but hey, I can't help it. I'm hooked. Ever seen Lost? Y'know Charlie, like him. Only with writing this story instead of the whole heroine malarkey._

'That's right' The Englishman said 'I'm here to investigate some strange goings on'

'Why isn't a detective doing it?' Kurt asked.

BANG

'That's why' Romy said, holding out his gun. 'No one speaks out of line while I'm around'

'Well, there are only four of us now' Scott said to Logan.

'You, shut up!' The Major said.

'Me?' Logan asked.

'No, him, the one talking'

'Oh, me' Scott said.

'Yes'

'Well, Romy-'

'That's Major Romy to you'

'Major Romy, nothing strange has been going on around here, nothing out of the ordinary' Scott said.

'Hey, Scott, come and help me with Chester's body!' Jean called from the dining room.

'Hey, what?' Major Romy asked, in a very English accent.

'Um…Chester's our dog. He died yesterday poor guy' Scott quickly said.

'I see' Romy started to pace the room. 'There have been a number of gunshots heard in this vicinity, and also, there seems to be a dead person right there!' Romy pointed at Kurt's body.

'Well, you just shot him' Scott said simply.

'Quite'

'So, how is that _anything_ to do with us?' Logan asked.

'Well, it was a test, it was neither shocking nor upsetting that your friend is now late' Major Romy looked Scott straight in the eye 'which means you are used to your friends being shot'

'Maybe I just hide my emotions well' Scott sniffed loudly 'God I miss him'

'Listen' The Major walked over to him 'Shut up, there is definitely something strange going on here'

'I have to do everything myself, don't I?' Jean said, Chester's corpse on her back.

Major Romy Stared at her in disbelief.

'It's not what it looks like!' Scott said, throwing himself on front of Jean, blocking the view of Romy.

'Scott, stop being a prick and help me with- oh my lord!' Jean said, pointing to Kurt's body and letting Chester's flop to the floor.

'That's me name' Logan said, stepping forward. Everyone was very un-amused. 'Oh, come on, I'm kidding' He said.

'Listen, whether or not you're kidding is not the issue right now' Major Romy said, circling round Chester's body 'He's dead' He said, after several minutes.

'Uhhh….yeah, um, yeah you see-'

'I am not!' Chester said, getting up and straightening his clothes.

'OH, thank the lord!' Scott said, holding his hands up in prayer.

'I hear ya' Logan said, patting him on the head.

'Chester, how ever did you make it?' Jean asked.

'Oh, well, it's a long story really' Chester explained.

'Oh?' Jean's face sank 'Oh, in that case I don't care' Major Romy stood back astonished.

'You, you were dead!' He stepped forward a little menacingly 'I saw you!'

'Major Romy' Chester said, his eyes narrowing.

'Chester' Romy said, his eyes doing the same.

'Have you two met?' Logan interrupted, but the question was not answered, immediately the two acquaintances charged toward one another. Chester quickly jumped on Romy's face and started pummeling him savagely. To counter this, Romy started hitting him with his stick, and before you could say 'randomosity', they had both charged through the window that over looked the cliff face and they were gone forever, leaving three very confused faces.

'I'll take that as a yes, then?' Logan murmured.

'Well that was a little peculiar' Jean said, scratching her head.

'What in sweet sweet Louisiana Christ's holy name is goin' on here?' Rogue shouted from the doorway. 'Ya'll'

'Shut up' Scott said, as he left the room, the other two following.

'Well! I'm not clearing this up!' Rogue pouted, her hands on her hips, before she solemnly collected a brush and started to sweep the broken glass.

_Later that day, the living room…_

The hole in the window was still, quite prominently, there, but no one seemed to notice. Jean was reading by the fireplace, Scott was playing chess by himself and Logan and the Professor were talking and Rogue, well, Rogue was nowhere to be seen.

'So, Logan, I understand that if you pass on this homework, you'll graduate into the first grade?' The Professor asked, putting his fingers together.

'Yep, and with some help from you guys, it'll be a synch; Jean's already helped me a little' Logan looked over at Jean 'Thank you Jean'

'Its okay, Logan' She replied, returning to her book.

'Checkmate!' Scott exclaimed before he walked across to the other end of the board. 'Goddamn it!'

'Loose against yourself again, honey?' Jean asked, not even looking up from her book.

'Yeah' Scott answered, sulking.

'Oh my God!' The Professor shouted 'My windows gone!'

'Yeah, funny story that' Scott said, not bothering to tell it.

'Logan, you'll tell me where my window is won't you?' The Professor asked.

'Yeah, okay' Logan walked over the broken pane and pointed down over the cliff 'There's a bit there, and a bit there, oh, and a bit over there'

'I find this very frustrating and my gun hasn't been fed today' The Professor scowled

'Don't worry Professor!' Shouted a Southern voice 'Ya'll' Rogue walked in with a large, flat, window shaped package wrapped neatly in colored paper and tied together with a large red bow.

'Oh my' The Professor said 'Isn't that heavy?'

'Oh my yes' Rogue said, with just a touch of strain in her voice.

'Well, what is it?' The Professor asked, raising an eyebrow 'It's not another set of dinner mats is it?'

'That's some big dinner mats' Scott said nodding.

'It's not dinner mats'

'Woah, I've seen some dinner mats in my time, but…whoa' Scott said, in slight awe.

'Scott, listen, it's not dinner mat-'

'God. Such big dinner mats they must be'

'Shut up' Xavier said 'Give me my present' Rogue pushed the window-shaped gift over to the Professor, who pulled the ribbon once, and the paper fell to the floor, to reveal a large window… with a picture of Gambit in stain glass on it.

'Rogue…' The Professor started.

'Yeah…'

'What the hell is this supposed to be?' The Professor looked at it in confusion 'it looks a bit like a man with a large silver stick in place of a hand'

'There was a problem, the stained glass guy I went to couldn't _do _hands…so…y'know' Rogue shrugged.

'Is it supposed to be Gambit?' Scott asked.

'…yes…?' Rogue said, gazing transfixed at the stained glass.

'It's very nice, now throw it away' The Professor pushed the window out of the way.

'I got a discount'

'Logan?' The Professor started.

'Yeah?'

'Nothing'

_Logan's second day…_

'Yo, Doll' Logan said to Miss Rivers, who sighed and took another swig of her drink.

'Hello, Logan' she answered, sort of slurred. 'Now everyone take your seats' The Children took there seats as Miss Rivers surveyed the class room.

'Roland'

'Yes miss'

'Louise'

'Yes miss'

'Logan'

'Yo, bubette'

Miss River let out a long sigh 'Chester?' There was a silence.

'Chester?'

'Logan? Where's Chester?'

Logan shrugged simply 'Dead?'

There was a large applause from the kids behind Logan, followed by a very loud 'YAY'.

Miss Rivers sighed again.

'Okay, today, the alphabet, Logan, if you would go first'

'Sure thing, doll'

Another sigh.

'A is for AHHHH!' Logan started, letting out a long blood curdling scream, forcing some of the students to break into tears. Miss River grimaced and nodded at Logan.

'B is for BUB!' Logan smiled. And Miss Rivers nodded again.

'C is for, CRASH!' Logan through chair across the room, narrowly missing a little girl, who fainted soon after.

'D is for DANGER! GRRR!' Logan growled.

'E is for….EAIIIIIII!' Logan let out another horrid scream, forcing Miss Rivers to cover her ears.

'F is for FU-'

'NOOO!' Miss Rivers shouted, reaching out for Logan's hand.

'S is for SNICKT!' Logan shouted, unsheathing his claws.

'Thir' A little voice asked. 'What about the retht of the afabet, thir?'

'Um…uhhh'

'You passed, Logan' Miss Rivers interrupted.

'I did?' Logan asked.

'Yes'

'Even when I said fu-'

'YES! Yes, Logan, now, just go' Miss Rivers indicated the door. Logan walked through it happily. He walked cheerfully down the hall and opened the door marked '2'.

'Hey, Bubs and bubettes' He waved to the class 'I failed didn't I?'

'Of course not Logan, now, take a seat. John, be quiet!' She pointed at a rather tall red headed kid sitting at the front.

'Pyro?' Logan asked. Pyro turned around nervously but quickly looked away, covering his face.

'Pyro? What are you doing here?' Logan asked.

'Zhis is highly unfair!' A deep Russian voice said from the back, Logan turned his head, and it was Colossus, with a large, pointy Dunce Hat atop his head.

'I've vorked doubly as hard as you zree, why am_ I_ the dunce?' Colossus asked.

'Because you can't count!' A very prominent southern accent said from the front row.

'Remy, you've got one last chance to be quiet!' The teacher said.

'Sorry, miss'

'That's okay then'

'I'm being good aren't I miss?' Sabertooth asked his hands neatly in his lap.

'Yes. You have been very good. Well done, Victor'

'Sabretooth loves the teacher!' Pyro sang, and Gambit joined in.

'Sabretooth loves the teacher!' They both sang in chorus.

'shut up shut up shut up' Colossus shouted. 'I'm trying to catch up!' Colossus looked very cramped in the tiny chair and desk and was hurriedly working and reading.

'If I have von apple, and add two more apples, how many apples do I have?'

'Peter be quite, and you two, to the back of the class!' The Teacher shouted. Gambit and Pyro solemnly moved to the empty chairs that were next to Colossus.

'Well done. You got me in trouble!' Gambit elbowed Pyro and continued to put.

'How many apples vould I have?' Colossus shouted, snapping his pencil by accident.

'Well. It's not five' Pyro said, looking over Colossus's shoulder.

'Grrrr' Colossus rubbed out his answer and wrote in a different one.

'It's not seven either' Pyro said again.

'Logan, sit here, next to Victor' The Teacher said.

'…Okay'

'Miss! Miss!' Sabretooth raised his hand urgently 'Logan is a bad influence on me'

'I am not!' Logan argued back.

'Are too!'

'Am not!'

'Are too!'

'Am not!'

'Now, come on, calm down' The teacher said 'Victor, if it really troubles you, Logan can sit somewhere else'

'Ha! Logan got in trouble!' Pyro shouted from the back of the class.

'JOHN! Go to the time out corner!' The Teacher shouted. Reluctantly, Pyro walked over to the corner and sat on the small chair.

'Face the corner' Pyro did as he was told.

_Lunchtime…_

'Magneto packed me a gingerbread man' Gambit said, lifting the gingerbread man out of his lunchbox.

'What?' Pyro opened his lunchbox, which had a cute little picture of a kangaroo on the front 'How come I didn't get one?'

'Because you spilt his coffee this morning' Gambit took a bite out of his gingerbread man.

'That was Colossus' Pyro sulked and bit into his peanut butter sandwich.

'It vas, and I still got a gingerbread man' Colossus held it up happily, his dunce hat still atop his head.

'What in the name of holy platypus's didgeridoo!' Pyro shouted.

'Stop being so Australian!' Logan shouted.

'Who asked you? You loser!' Gambit shouted at him.

'…you don't have to be so mean' Sabretooth ran over in tears, and slumped down next to Gambit.

'What seems to be the matter, monsieur?' He asked.

'That mean kid over there stole my lunch' Sabretooth pointed to a large fat kid, currently eating.

'That big bully!' Pyro shouted, rising to his feet.

'Don't! He'll beat you up!' Sabretooth shouted.

'Don't worry! I'll sort that punk out!' Pyro confidently walked over to the bully and tapped him on the shoulder.

'What do you want?' The Bully asked.

'Now listen, mate!' Pyro started 'You upset my friend over there, now give him back his lunch!'

'Oh, a wise guy, eh?' The Bully got up; he was a good three feet shorter than Pyro.

'Uhhh…now calm down!' But the bully did not. He kept walking slowly towards Pyro, pulling up his shirt sleeves.

'Gulp'

_At the bench…_

'Logan' Whispered Gambit.

'Yeah?'

'There's a secret you should know…' They were distracted momentarily by Pyro's screams as the bully put him in a headlock.

'The Professor is not what he seems!' Gambit said, looking into Logan's eyes.

'What do you mean?'

'He is not what he seems, it's pretty self explanatory'

'I know, but, in what way?' Logan asked.

'I can't talk right now. But, don't trust anyone, not the Professor, not that kid Chester…not even me' Gambit pointed to himself.

'I didn't trust you in the first place, you're a bad guy' Logan scratched his head. 'And how did you know about Chester-'

'Listen, ignore every little fight we've had' Gambit looked across at Colossus. 'Colossus, back me up here'

'Oh yes, Magneto sent us here to tell you this, plus, we're a little dumb' He continued chewing his gingerbread man.

'Tomorrow, be ready tomorrow, we're gonna break this joint'

_At the institute…_

There was a loud knocking at the door, Scott went over to open it. On the other side, was Major. Romy.

'Major. Romy?' Scott asked, astonished 'I thought you were dead!'

Romy came in, leaning on his cane for support, he was soaking wet, and had a large gash across his face.

'Well, luckily, I survived the fall…as did Chester' Romy spoke seriously, and there was a touch of fear in his voice.

'Yeah, what's with you and Chester?' Scott asked, closing the door.

'We're old enemies. But this is no time for explanations, is the Professor home?' Romy looked sternly up at Scott.

'Uh…no, he's out, why?'

'Good' Romy sighed 'You and your friends need to leave with me tonight'

'Um…why?' Scott sat down.

'Because…' Romy stood up 'You will all be dead in the morning if you don't'

'Is that a threat?' Scott asked, standing up as well.

'No…it's a warning. I know this is all very hard to believe, but the Professor, he, he's not what he seems'

'Scott, have you seen my- Oh my lord, Major Romy!' Jean shouted.

'Jean, this guy says we need to leave tonight' Scott said.

'About time, you never take me out anymore' Jean pouted and crossed her arms. An unseen chorus went _'ooooooo'._

'What the-' Scott looked around the room, confused about the sudden sound. 'No, he says it's not safe here'

'Listen, you are in grave danger, GRAVE DANGER' Romy paused for a second 'GRAVE DANGER!'

'Yeah yeah, sure'

_Meanwhile…_

'Is Romy dealt with?' A mysterious voice said from the shadows.

'No, sir, sorry. He got away from me' Chester answered, bowing.

'What about you' The Voice indicated another bowing figure 'Evan, have you got the Morlocks on our side?'

Evan raised his head 'Sure have, dude'

'Well done. And you, did you learn anything from this…activity?' The voice was speaking to yet another figure, this time a woman.

'Sorry, sir. I think he was onto us, he keeps foiling my plans I-'

'Miss Rivers, are saying you failed me? Yet again?'

Miss Rivers raised her head, a horrified look on her face.

'Please sir, give me one more chance!' She pleaded. 'I'll do better, I promise'

'Rivers, Rivers, Rivers, I have given you too many chances already' the voice said.

'No! I can-'

BANG

'No. You can't' The Professor wheeled forward, gun in hand. 'Who's ya daddy?'

'Xavier! Xavier!' his people chorused.

'Calisto? Is the bomb in place?' Xavier asked, looking in her direction. She raised her head and nodded once.

_That night, all through the house, not a creature was stirring, not even a… I'm sorry, I seem to have gone off the point slightly…_

_That night…_

'Boy, that Romy sure liked to talk about danger and explosions a lot didn't he?' Scott sat down on a chair and yawned 'with the way he was talking, you'd think someone was gonna blow up the institute with a bomb' (hint hint)

'Yeah? And what are the chances of that happening…again?' Jean scratched her head.

'Yeah, and y'know, who'd go to the trouble of blowing this place up anyway? Evan? Calisto? The Professor?' They all laughed heartily.

But soon, there laughing was stopped by a very loud ticking noise.

'God damn it, Rogue, turn that clock down!' Scott shouted hitting the ceiling with a broom. 'That girl sure likes clocks' Scott said to himself before settling down

'Hey, Scott, honey?' Jean started 'Did you turn off the sprinkler system?'

'…yes?'

_A few minutes later… _

'God damn Jean and her god damn sprinklers' Scott murmured to himself as he walked though the garden.

'Stupid sprinklers, doin' stupid things' He pulled a lever, and the sprinklers stopped abruptly. 'now I gotta go all the way back to the institute and-' his complaining was cut short when the sprinklers suddenly turned back on again and soaked him through.

'GOD. DAMN. SPRINKLERS!' Scott picked up a patio chair and started clubbing random patches of grass.

Patio- A patio is a paved area of a garden or grassed area. Deck chairs and tables are often put there. An umbrella is usually slotted through a hole in the middle of the deck table(s), this stops either rain or the suns rays from hitting the person or persons underneath it. It is a popular choice when hosting parties or celebrations of some kind. Mark Thompson (specialist patio expert from Patio Weekly) said this _'A patio should be a freedom from stress. A hard days work can often be countered by a nice night outside on the patio' _Many people have taken this to mean different things. Some say Mark means you should spend all night on the patio. Some argue that that is a stupid thing to assume he means _all_ night.

'I hope you're happy Jean!' Scott shouted, waving his fist angrily at the institute. 'You and your twister, well Jean, I hope that twister mat can go on holidays, cos I'm not taking you ANYWHERE!'

BANG

The institute blew up. Scott stood there, his fist still raised, but now with a look of utter disbelief on his face.

'…….damn'

'You got that right' Danielle said, standing next to him.

'Dorris! You're alive!' Scott said.

'Name's Danielle Moonstar, chief detective of the MDA: Mutant detective agency' She explained.

'No kidding' Scott said, unimpressed.

'Listen, I know it's a hard time for you right now' Danielle placed an apologetic hand on Scott's shoulder.

'Why?'

'….because you're friends just died'

'Oh….yeah' Scott slumped down on the wet grass and looked sadly at the Institute. 'Its all gone. My Rogue, My Jean, my portable television'

'You're twister mat'

'Don't even joke about that' Scott sniffed 'Twister wasn't that bad. God Jean, Twister wasn't so important, why'd you have to go and blow up the Institute?' Scott shouted at the burning remains.

'It wasn't Jean that did this Scott' Danielle said, getting out a folder with 'Top Priority' written on it, in large red letters.

'It wasn't? Then who?'

'Him' Danielle opened the folder and held the opened page in front of Scott's head.

'The Professor did this? Again?' Scott looked depressed 'But what can I do Doris? I'm just a dumb kid, with a cool visor and the ability to shoot a lasers strong enough to puncture a hole through a mountain from my eyes. I'm useless'

'I have faith in you, Scott. With your help we can stop the Professor. Before it's too late' Danielle said.

'What's the point, Rogue, and Jean, both gone, now I have no chicks worshiping the ground I walk on' I rested his chin on his hands.

'If you don't do it for me… just think of your TV'

'Let's get that bastard'

_The MDA headquarters, later that night…_

'What's the Professor doing this all for anyway?' Scott said, trying to keep up with Danielle's quick pace.

'He has a master plan underway. He plans to raise an army of powerful killers, mutant or human and kill everyone' Danielle stopped at a doorway.

'Everyone? Isn't that a little…stupid?'

'You don't believe me, we found his 'to do' list' Danielle handed Scott a piece of paper with a list written on it:

1: Raise army of killers…

2: Kill everyone…

'That's damning evidence' Scott said, handing the paper back.

'No kidding'

'So, what's our plan of action? Blast him?' Scott asked, readying his visor.

'We're gonna raise a small team together, go after him' Danielle explained.

'You know here he is?'

'Yes, we found his business card' Danielle handed Scott another piece of paper:

Things need killing? Call the Professor at this number 233122.

Home address- The biggest castle on the block. The black one with a skull above the door.

Or email the Professor at do you think this means?' Scott asked.

'Our forensic experts have run some tests and said here' She pointed at the card 'Where it says Home address, is probably where he lives'

'Interesting'

'Indeed'

'Who does this team consist of?' Scott asked, pocketing the card.

'Well…you and me, basically' She explained.

'What? What about the rest of the MDA?' Scott asked, confused.

'I'm the only member of the MDA'

'But, you have these headquarters, all to your self?'

'Headquarters? This is Burger King' Danielle opened the double doors, and it was indeed, burger king.

'We could get Logan on our side' Scott whispered into Danielle's ear, both of them now sitting comfortably down.

'Wolverine? He would be helpful, but how are we gonna break him outta class?' Danielle asked.

'The only way I know how' Scott looked into the distance 'Doris, do you have the plans to Logan's school?'

'Actually yes' She fished some blue prints out of her pocket and laid them on the table 'I knew these would come in handy'

'Now, according to my knowledge of breaking into class rooms, which isn't much, the weak spot is just…here…the time out corner'

_That's it for now, until later. My friends and precious little reviewers._

_Next time, on Bubs and bubettes…._

'_Come on Colossus, we're getting out of here' Pyro shouted quickly heading for the exit._

'_I'm staying!' He shouted 'I need to know about the apples god damn it!'_

'_Y'know colossus, numbers and apples aren't the same thing' Pyro said._

'_Looks like I got question seven wrong…' _


	4. Magneto's Fate

**Part four…Magneto's Fate**

_Alrighty roo, here be the fourth chapter...I think I have to say this was probably alot more forced than any of the others, but still, I enjoyed writing non the less. Next chapter, is a strange one I have to say...original to say the least._

_At the school…._

'A, B, C-' Logan was interrupted by a large explosion, coming from the time out corner. A large hole was now visible through the debris, with a mysterious figure standing out side it. Pyro, who was still sitting there, had jumped to safety and was now awkwardly looking out the hole.

'Logan! Come on!' Cyclops shouted, scouting out the area. 'Nobody move, you! Sit down!' He shouted at the teacher. Who did as she was told.

'Okay' Logan shrugged and ran out of the hole. Outside Danielle was holding a shotgun to the principles head and indicated Logan to the X-van.

'Right, now! I want $200,000 in notes!' Scott demanded from the hole 'You!' He pointed to a little kid who was hiding under a table. 'Put the money in this!' he threw him a brown bag.

'Please. This is a school!' The teacher pleaded 'We don't have any money!'

'Don't talk back to me! I'm sleepy, I'm vengeful, I'm wet and crazy! I don't know what I'll do next!' Scott scouted the area one more time, before jumping quickly through the wall and chucking a grenade back into the class room.

'GO! GO! GO!' Scott shouted, running towards the car, quickly followed by the acolytes Sabretooth was the last out, he ran and jumped out of the door, not a second later the classroom exploded.

'That was close!' Sabretooth said, lying on the floor, looking at the burning classroom.

'Everybody! IN IN IN!' Scot shouted, looking at the acolytes.

'Excuse me' The Teacher blocked Cyclops path 'What are you doing this fo-'

ZAPP

She fell to the floor. Cyclops let out a relieved breath a celebration much like Chester's death had coming from the children.

'No, THAT was close' He said.

Gambit jumped into the van, quickly followed by Sabretooth, Colossus was sitting on the playground floor, hurriedly reading his math's book. His dunce cap was still on his head. He looked rushed, and was quickly scribbling down answers.

'Come on Colossus, we're getting out of here' Pyro shouted quickly heading for the van.

'I'm staying!' He shouted 'I need to know about the apples god damn it!'

'Y'know colossus, numbers and apples aren't the same thing' Pyro said

'Looks like I got question seven wrong…'

'Come on!' Pyro stole his math's book and ran into the X-van with it. Colossus desperately chased after it.

'Is that everybody?' Cyclops asked, getting into the van.

'I think so' Logan answered, starting the van up.

'Doris! Come on!' Scott called, and she quickly jumped in and they started to drive away. The Principle was on the sidewalk, yelling at them to stop, waving his arms around wildly.

'Oh crap! They're retaliating!' Cyclops yelled looking out the window 'Don't worry, I'll zap him'

'Hold on, Cyke' Logan narrowed his eyes 'I got this one' Logan swerved and rammed the car straight into him'

'Was that really necessary?' Pyro asked looking at the principle's twitching body.

'He ran out in front of me. What was I supposed to do? Stop? Don't be stupid' Logan put the car into reverse and ran over the principle another time. And again, and again, and again.

'Logan. He's dead man' Cyclops lay a hand on Logan's shoulder. Logan nodded once and began to drive away.

_Some minutes later…_

'News at five! An homicidal attack at the Bayville elementary school. Many were ki-' Cyclops turned off the radio.

'Hey! I wanted to see if I was mentioned!' Pyro complained.

'There are much more important things to worry about' Scott said 'Doris! Explain'

'Listen. The professor has gone crazy-'

'Yes. We know. We were sent to tell Wolverine' Gambit said, opening and closing his window.

'Three!' Shouted Colossus 'There are three apples!' He scribbled the answer down on his math's book.

'Where exactly are we going?' Pyro asked 'This isn't where the Professor is'

'We're going to see Magneto' Scott answered, looking at the five people crammed in the back. Gambit was squashed up against the window, looking very grumpy. Danielle was next to him, holding her shotgun, and looking very squashed. Pyro and Colossus were fighting over they're amount of space and Sabretooth was at the other window looking sad.

'Could we stop soon?' Gambit I asked 'I need to go to the bathroom'

'We'll stop at the next gas station' Logan said.

'But I need to go now' Gambit whined

'Look. Did you just see that sign? It said Gas station ten miles' Logan argued

'Ten miles? That's aaaaages. Come on, I'm bursting' Gambit argued back.

'We're not stopping yet, and that's that'

_One minute later…_

'Is that Cajun giving birth or something?' Logan asked, leaning on the steering wheel, a very somber expression on.

There was a high pitched scream from behind a cactus, and Gambit quickly ran out, doing his flies up.

'Drive! Quickly!' Logan started the car and drove off full speed.

'What was it Gambit?' Danielle asked 'The Professor?'

'No!' Gambit managed to say between breaths 'Scorpion'

'You made us run from a scorpion?' Cyclops asked 'Was it big?'

'No! It was one of those little ones' Gambit answered.

'God, you sissy'

'I'll have you know I'm allergic to scorpion stings' Gambit said 'If I got stung I could be dead'

'You're not allergic to scorpion stings, you're allergic to: Bee stings, citrus fruits, water melon, chicken and lobster' Pyro said.

'You're allergic to Chicken' Scott asked 'But you're a Cajun, no chicken means no Gumbo or Jambalaya'

'Hey! I can't control what I'm allergic to okay?' Gambit sulked 'It just so happens my sister is allergic to swamp water, crocodiles and accordions. Doesn't make us any less southern'

'I suppose you're right, sorry' Scott said.

'How can you be allergic to accordions?' Pyro asked 'And I thought you were adopted, how do you know your sister?'

'Listen' Gambit turned to Pyro 'Shut up'

'Okay, here we are' Logan pulled into the gas station 'Don't steal or break anything'

'We make no promises' Pyro said and the car quickly emptied.

_In the gas station..._

'Twelve dollars for a can of soup?' Sabretooth screamed, holding a can in his hand 'That's such a rip off'

'Sorry. The price is the price' The Salesman said.

'You run a tough business' Sabretooth looked again at the soup 'I'll give you nine dollars for it'

'Ten'

'Four'

'Ten'

'Three?'

'Ten'

'Fine, Two'

'Ten, that's my final offer' The salesman said, crossing his arms.

'Eight'

'Ten'

'Seven'

'Ten'

'Six'

'Thirteen'

'Done' Sabretooth handed him the money and looked happily at his soup can.

Gambit was looking at the 'compeletely clean magazines' in the cornor of the shop, looking nervously around from time to time. Colossus was studying the apples carefully; he wondered what was so special about them. And Pyro was buying matches...yeah, one track mind or what? Logan and Cyclops were filling the up the X-van outside and Danielle was shooting cans off a brick wall, target practice.

'Gambit?' Pyro asked.

'Yes?' Gambit quickly tucked the magazine into a brown paper bag 'What?'

'What if the Professor has already got to Magneto's place?' Pyro looked generally worried.

'So? I thought you hated old Mags'

'I do. But. Let me explain, y'know when you eat chocolate marshmallows, and you really hate 'em, but you just keep eating and eating'

'Is this gonna be gross?' Gambit cringed.

'No. Well. It's like that with Magneto' Pyro smiled.

'Ya huh. I can't see any comparrison'

'Well, without Magneto, I have no star to lead me, y'know what I'm saying?' Pyro smiled again.

'Oh.' Gambit looked confused 'Whats that got to do with chocolate marshmallows?'

'Nothing...I guess'

'Then why did you mention them at all?' Gambit asked.

'Okay. I'm gonna cut to the chase. Can you buy me some chocolate marshmallows?'

'How much are they?'

'Twelve dollars'

'Twelve dollars for some chocolate marshmallows?' Gambit shouted 'What a rip off'

'Don't make a scene, Gambit'

'No. I think I will' Gambit walked over to the counter and slammed his fist on the counter, the salesman jumped a little.

'What kind of monster sells chocolate marshmallows for twelve dollars?' Gambit shouted, holding the, now squished, marshmallows in his hand.

'The price is the price, okay?' The shop owner said 'I can't do anything about it'

'Fine' Gambit forked over his money and walked to the doorway 'But I'm not buying this paper' Gambit threw the paper on the ground and left the shop.

_Outside..._

BANG BANG BANG

Danielle reloaded her shotgun and shot again.

'Yo, Doris, that's quite an eye you got there' Scott said, walking over to her 'Where'd you learn to shoot like that?'

'Shooting school' Danielle answered simply 'They teach people philosophy mainly, plus shooting things on the side'

'You're a philosophy student?'

'No, I didn't pass'

'Damn'

'Yep' Danielle fired three more shots.

'So...bet you can't hit all the cans around in less than five seconds' Scott wagered.

'How much?'

'Ten dollars' Scott looked in his wallet '...Two dollars' Scott corrected himself.

'Okay dokay' Danielle fired once.

BANG- Hit the first can

BANG- The second.

BANG- And the third.

BANG- ?

'There are only three cans, what was the last one for' Scott asked, as the bullet rebound off a traffic sign, off Wolverine's head, off the van and - SPLAT -soup covered a very shocked Sabretooth.

'My soup' Sabretooth moaned, looking down at the mess. 'You shot my soup'

'Hey, it was a bet' Danielle said.

'A bet on what? How mean you are?' Sabretooth whimpered.

'Fork over the two dollars, Cyke' Danielle said.

'Okay. Just one minute' Scott went over to Logan 'Logan, can I borrow two dollars?'

'My head hurts' Logan said simply, rubbing his head 'I don't have any money'

Scott walked back over to Danielle.

'Listen, I'm gonna level with ya' He rubbed his neck 'I don't have any money, but as soon as I get some, those two dollars are yours'

_Later…_

'What were you gonna do with that soup?' Gambit finally asked, looking at Sabretooth, who still had tomato soup in patches, no matter how hard he scrubbed.

'I was gonna eat it' Sabretooth said 'Duh'

'How?' Gambit indicated the van 'there's no cooker in the van'

'I disagree' Sabretooth looked down at Pyro 'Him'

'I'm not your microwave, Sabretooth' Pyro threatened.

The car suddenly pulled up outside a large metal dome. 'Magneto's Hideout' was written in large sparkling letters above the door with a large neon arrow pointing downwards.

'Is this the place?' Scott asked looking at it closely

'Yes'

'Something's wrong' Logan said, sniffing.

'What is it. Logan?' Scott looked around anxiously 'What do you smell?'

'Smell?' Logan looked at him a VERY confused look on his face 'Are you under the impression that I have super smelling ability?'

'Well-'

''Cos I don't' Logan sniffed again.

'But you like, sniff, all the time' Scott said.

'Because I have a cold permanently' Logan sniffed again 'duh'

They slid out of the car and crept inside. It was altogether too quiet. Apart from Pyro's manic chuckling and Gambit forever singing 'Jambalaya' to himself. But. Too quiet, still. Logan led the way, his claws out.

'Do you think Magneto's alright?' Sabretooth asked gambit, as they walked along.

'I dunno' Gambit answered 'Maybe…Jambalaya, crawfish pie, fillet gumbo, for tonight down, I'm gonna see ma ma chere armoio'

'Oh. Gambit, talking of your 'chere'' Scott started, stopping and looking at Gambit 'She's dead' Scott hurriedly started moving again.

'What?' Gambit asked in disbelief 'Ma cherie is dead?'

'Yeah, she exploded' Scott answered, rubbing the back of his neck. Gambit fell to his knees and cried.

'NOOOOOOoooooooo' Gambit wept, crying out again and again

'Yeah, it was horrid mess, we couldn't find any of her' Scott said, trying to comfort him, he still wept.

'Well, actually we didn't bother looking' Scott corrected himself, he still wept.

'I suppose there could be some stuff left of her' Scott continued, wondering, he still wept.

'Probably not recognizable though, it was pretty big explosion' Scott nodded, and Gambit still wept.

'It's probably all slimy and icky' Scott kept talking, while Gambit wept.

'But more likely her body was completely eviscerated off the face of the world.' Scott corrected himself again, and Gambit still wept.

'Like she never existed…'

'Shut up, Scott' Logan looked down at Gambit 'Are you crying, like a woman?' Gambit sniffed once before dusting off his clothes and getting off the floor.

'Yes' He answered simply, before continuing down the eerie passage way. They walked for about ten minutes before one of the acolytes actually told them which way to go. They traveled to the bathroom, where they waited precisely four minutes for Pyro, they then traveled to the study, by accident. They wondered round the hideout perpetually lost for about twenty minutes before finding the entrance and starting from scratch. They got lost again. Then, Pyro led them to the kitchen where they had a small snack. Nothing fancy, a few omelets with French fries, with a banana sundae for desert. This took precisely thirty minutes. They then set up camp near the airing cupboard before traveling in the morning at about eighth O'clock, they then went back to the kitchen and made toast which they ate with butter and jam. They then got lost one more time before finding Magneto's office. It is now three thirty the following day.

'Where's Magneto?' Colossus asked looking round the office. All of their faces were now covered in stubble and their clothes battered and ripped.

'I dunno' Logan looked around again 'but he certainly isn't here, shall we continue the search?'

'But we've been searching for three days…this is mind bogglingly stupid' Danielle complained, her gun in hand.

'Wait there he is!' Gambit screamed pointing at a bookcase which had toppled over, Magneto lay unconscious underneath it, a puddle of blood leaking from under it. His eyes were blood shot and he was white as a sheet. He coughed weakly.

'My acolytes' He said in a harsh voice 'Charles was here, he's gone crazy!'

'Try not to talk, boss' Gambit said, looking at the bookcase 'Because I really don't care'

'I will say my peace before I die' Magneto said.

'Don't talk like that' Pyro begged, wiping away a tear.

'I need too' Magneto coughed again 'Charles knew my weakness, he knows everyone's weakness!'

'Yours is bookcases?' Logan asked

'No!' Magneto coughed 'Mine is being shot whilst sleeping; it's a very common weakness really.'

'Then…why are you under a bookcase?' Scott asked scratching his head.

'…This is where I sleep' And with that, Magneto died, a lonely old man, a great ambition to have.

'Was he being sarcastic?' Scott asked, quite offended.

'I dunno' Logan answered.

'Looks like we'll never know now…' Gambit said, taking off his…hat?

'Where'd you get that hat from?' Sabretooth asked.

'Its dramatic effect…look it up' Gambit snorted.

'Yeah?... Well screw you!' swish! Sabretooth thought, then, without warning out, from behind Magneto's desk, stepped the Morlocks, each one as weird looking as the last, especially the little moley guy, who's green, and can apparently see through walls.

'Ah, Morlocks' Scott screamed and hid behind Magneto's body 'Are they gone?' he asked shyly, not three seconds later.

'No Scott, they're still here' Logan answered.

'Oh…tell me when they've gone' Scott whimpered.

'Listen, freaks, we don't wanna have to kick your asses' Gambit said, with his battle face on 'so move aside'

'Gambit, they're not even in the way of the door' Pyro said 'Plus, they might not even want to fight us'

'We've come to kill you' The little, green, moley guy, who can apparently see through walls said.

'See, what did I tell you' Gambit screamed 'Mister 'they might not even want to fight'' Gambit shouted in a VERY bad Australian accent.

'Hey, that was uncanny' Sabretooth said 'You sounded exactly like him'

'You're one to talk…the same guy that does Pyro's voice does your as well' Scott said from behind magneto's body.

'What are talking about?' Logan asked scratching his head 'Voices, no one does peoples voices Scott, this isn't a cartoon show'

'But…that is so weird; I just got in contact with a parallel universe again, where we are all fictional and people do our voices, it's weird, they sound exactly like us' There was an eerie silence.

'Gas them' One of the Morlocks said, and the team was gassed

_Wahey, see what I mean about the forcing? If you don't...great! If you do...damn. Next chapter gonna be loosely based on a recent horror film...which has an even more recent sequal. I love these horror films, even if they're kinda gross and nightmarish...plus...he saws his own foot off, EEEEEWWW._

_Preveiw:_

_'YES!' Logan shouted 'Thank god, there's a packet of cigars in here'_

_'Logan, do you really want to smoke them' Scott rubbed the back of his neck 'They have been in a toilet…its jut a little saying of mine, but I always think…don't smoke anything you find in a toilet'_

_'I'm not going to smoke it, I'm not stupid' Logan looked down at the floor 'There's no lighter anyway'_

_TTFN_


	5. Saw Style: With saws and everything

Part Five…Saw style, with foot sawing and everything.

_Okay, Part five, it's been a while, and my writing style might have changed a little. But it's a halloween special chapter, and so I hope you like it. WARNING it conatins miner swearing... and hinted strong swearing, I havn't warned this beforee but apparantly I have to. I also do not own X-men... but honestly, did you vere think I did? _

For the sake of our younger readers, I shall be replacing some words that are quite common in the film 'Saw' with other words which may be less offensive to some, but maybe more offensive to others…but hey, I can't please everybody. The code will be as follows:

F-ck: Fiddle Sticks

Sh-t: Sugar

M-ther F-cker: Dingus

F-ck you: Shut up

Son of B-tch: Bonehead

Logan eyes fluttered open, and found he was lying in a bathtub, full of water. Now Logan couldn't swim, and he hated water so he panicked…

'AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH' He screamed as he jumped out of the water, and onto the cold, tiled floor. He reached into the water and pulled out the plug in a panic stricken rage. The room was completely dark; he couldn't even see a hand in front of his face. He moved forward a little but found his ankle was strapped to something, he felt around his foot and found out they were heavy metal chains.

'Is anyone there?' Logan called into the darkness; there was a mumble from someone, like he was just waking up.

'Scott? Gambit?...Pyro?' He called again, feeling around for a light switch.

'Logan, is that you?' A familiar voice called to him 'It's me, Scott, do you have any idea where we are?'

'None' Logan smelt the air and then remembered he didn't have super smelling ability and stopped abruptly 'Is there a light switch over there, cyke?'

'I haven't checked, wait there' Logan heard rattling chains as Scott got up off the floor 'Hey, I think I found it'

There was a silence.

'Doesn't it work?' Logan called out to him.

'Oh, you want me to press it' Scott flipped the switch and half a dozen bright, white lights flickered on over head. The room was indeed an abandoned public bathroom. The tiles on the walls were falling off, and the ones that remained were in a messy state. The floor was covered in blood with a single dead man lying in the centre, his face a mess of brains and other stuff I'd care not to mention…this is only a K+ and the film is rated 18 so I have to cut certain bits out…including the scene with the nun and the hatchet, my god it's great but I do have standards, it's a shame, I know. But rules are rules! So anyway, back to our heroes. There were clouded mirrors and they covered the north facing wall. A single toilet was attached to the wall, right next too where Logan was sitting, it was filled to brim with all kinds of sugar.

'Where are we man?' Scott asked innocently.

'Fiddle sticks knows' Logan said rubbing his head 'Hey, what's that thing in that Dingus's hands'

'It looks likes a fiddle sticking tape recorder' Scott answered, trying to act cool 'I think I can reach it' Scott lay down on the ground and reached as far as he could, his fingers could just about rub against the plastic coating. 'Uggh, sugar, it's just out of reach'

'Take off your shirt' Logan said, growing impatient. Scott looked at him with wide eyes and a weird expression.

'…what?' He asked slowly.

'Take off your shirt so you can use it as lasso' Logan explained further.

'Oh…that makes much more sense' Scott started to take off his shirt 'Cos I though you were coming on-'

'Yes, okay'

'It's just I didn't know if you were really coming on to me or-'

'Just get the recorder'

Scott did as he was told. He lay down on the floor again and flung his shirt towards the tape recorder, the lasso idea didn't work so well, so Scott crawled forward a little more and able to reach it easily.

'Why didn't you do that before?' Logan asked him.

'Do what?'

'…nothing'

Scott looked at the tape recorder with misted eyes, the tape inside had his name written on it, in big block letters SCOTT SUMMERS.

'Scott, what is it?' Logan asked 'What the fiddle sticks is the matter'

'It…it has my name on it' Scott said darkly, pressing the play button slowly with his thumb. Out of it burst a sound so horrible, so traumatizingly horrid, that even Logan's metal spine tingled. It was a voice that sounded a lot like the professor singing…

'Only yoooooooou, can make, this world seem right, only yoooooou, can make the darkness bright, only you, and you alone, can make me happy-'

From the speakers placed about the room a sudden voice filled it…

'fiddle sticks, turn the tape over!' and the voice was gone.

'Was that the professor?' Logan asked 'I think it was' Scott did as he was told, and turned over the tape.

'Hello Scott, I know you all too well I think. I know about the secret plan you have about moving to Toronto and never calling us again. But I think it's time to change your plans. Around your ankles are adamantium chains, unbreakable metal, not even Wolverine's claws can cut through them. You have till the clock strikes twelve to free yourself from those chains or I kill the rest of your beloved team. Remember Scott, to free yourself you must find the key, are you willing to do anything to find it? …plus you'll also starve to death yourself if you do not do it on time TTFN'

'Fiddle sticks'

'Logan, do you know what this means' Scott asked.

'Yeah…The professor's gone crazy' Logan answered simply.

'Yeah! Plus, we're gonna die' Scott slumped down on the floor, depressed.

'You know what?' Logan said positively 'Maybe not all is lost; maybe, the professor was giving us a clue'

'A clue? When would he have possibly given us a clue?' Scott looked up 'Maybe the part he said our friends are gonna die, or maybe, the part where he said we're gonna die'

'No!' Logan remembered something 'To free yourself you must find the key'

'Well duh'

'Maybe he wants us to find the key' Logan said proudly.

'You know what, Logan, maybe there's a reason you went back to kindergarten' Scott closed his eyes again.

'But maybe the key isn't really a key, maybe it's a symbolic key, or a metaphorical key' Logan scanned the room closely till he spotted a large, loose brick in the wall with the word KEY written on it in permanent marker pen. 'Hey Scott, can you reach that large, loose brick, which says KEY on it?' Scott looked up at the brick.

'Yeah, but why?' He got up 'What would be the point'

'To free yourself you must find the key'

'What are you getting at, Logan?' Scott asked scratching his head 'What could you possibly mean?'

'The key, the key being the brick' Logan explained.

'Logan that brick couldn't fit in these chains' Scott said patronizingly 'God. Logan, just forget it, it was a stupid plan' a shoe flew across the room and his Scott square in the face.

'What the fiddle sticks was that for?'

'Just pull the brick, you dingus' Logan shouted.

'Fine…you don't have to go and throw a shoe at me' Scott walked over to the wall 'I got impatient with Jean sometimes…I never threw a shoe at her…except once…but that was just a game' Scott pulled out the brick; behind it was small wooden chest with note stuck on top of it.

'Hey Logan, I was right, there's a chest behind this brick' Scott picked off the note and read it out loud 'the key to this chest could be anywhere around you' he read out.

'It's behind one of the tiles' Logan said to himself 'Hey Scott, check behind every-' Logan was cut off by Scott slamming the brick down on the lock. The chest opened.

'Oh' Logan said quietly 'What's in there?'

'A tape…with your name on it' Scott slotted the tape into the recorder and looked at Logan for a sign on consent, he nodded once.

'Hello Logan, Or should I say James. That's your real name isn't it? James-Noisette Howdydoodyjimminay-Bob, isn't that right?'

'How did he know?' Logan asked himself, while Scott was forcing back a smile.

'I know a lot more than that, James. I know for a fact that you weren't in the Second World War; you did not know Captain America and you have not had such a miserable, lonely past. You are fifty two and until recently you have been living with your parents. You worked at Primart until four years ago, and only three years ago did you get that weird skeleton of yours which you volunteered for I hasten to add, you were paid six dollars for it. And that whole 'forgotten past' sugar you go on about may fool Scott, but you remember it like it were yesterday…nothing bad even happened. In fact, it's probably happened to loads of guys by now. But James…if you kill poor Scott over there, the chains will be released and no one will ever know about the terrible, life ruining truths you hold, goodbye James and here's a clue for you……look in the toilet' The tape stopped abruptly.

'Well…damn, I guess I should have seen that coming' Logan said jollily.

'James…Logan; are you going to kill me?' Scott asked 'Because I probably shouldn't mention there's a gun and number of bullets in here'

'Then why did you?'

'Because…I'm stupid'

'Did you hear what he said…'look in the toilet'…' Logan said, looking mysteriously into the distance.

'What do you think it means?' Scott said after a few minutes.

After a few more minutes Logan started to look in the toilet.

'God…this is really gross…its all sticky and weird feeling' Logan said his hand all the way down the toilet.

'Well duh, you've got your arm stuck in a toilet filled with all kinds of sugar…caster, granulated, demorara…muscavado. No wonder it feels weird'

'You got that right, it's all half dissolved when you get so deep' Logan replied 'Yep…I don't think there's anything down here'

'You have had your arm down there for twenty minutes' Scott looked at the toilet a bit more 'Hey, why not try lifting the top?'

'Lift the top? You mean stop doing the weird, disgusting thing and do the less gross more hygienic thing that I should have done in the first place?' Logan paused 'You're freaking genius, you know that?' Logan lifted his arm out of the toilet and rubbed it clean on the shower curtain, he then continued with the search by lifting the top off of the flushing mechanism.

'YES!' Logan shouted 'Thank god, there's a packet of cigars in here'

'Logan, do you really want to smoke them' Scott rubbed the back of his neck 'They have been in a toilet…its just a little saying of mine, but my Mom always said…don't smoke anything you find in a toilet'

'I'm not going to smoke it, I'm not stupid' Logan looked down at the floor 'There's no lighter anyway'

'Hey, is there anything else there?' Scott asked, leaning over as far as he could 'Like maybe a key or maybe some kind of escape device?'

'Nope, cigars…' Logan took one more look in the toilet 'Hey…and two saws'

'Didn't you see them before?'

'Well, I was pretty overcome with glee when I found the cigars' Logan reminisced for a moment 'God I love cigars'

'Logan…shut up, pass one of those saws this way' Logan skid a saw across the floor that landed nicely before Scott's feet. They both immediately took action and started sawing their respective chains; they were sawing for some time, Scott much more vigorously than Logan was. He was convinced it was working, but then…

SNAP

'Fiddle sticking sugar, stupid saw you dingus, you useless bonehead' Scott threw the saw across the room, and it struck the mirror in the centre, smashing it.

'That's seven years bad luck' Logan said calmly 'Did you really think they'd work, these chains are adamantium, the strongest metal in the known universe'

'It slipped my mind'

'If a stupid cheap saw would work on adamantium, then a lot more people like, Lady Deathstrike or Omega Red would be armed with saws' Logan took a deep breath 'They'd probably sneak into my bedroom at night and start sawing me there and then…with out seduction'

'Sedation'

'Shut up' Logan growled, he then had a quick glance at the mirror but then turned his head back to it again quickly, focusing on it 'Look on the glass on the floor…you can see through it'

'It's a one way mirror' Scott said 'The Professor's been watching us' Behind the mirror was a reinforced camera that was humming quietly.

'If you're watching this professor I hope you suffocate on you're 'hair growth spray'' Scott screamed at the camera.

_The Professor's Secret Base…Camera room._

'Oh. My. God.' The Professor turned his attention to his army of evil followers 'Which one of you told him about my hair spray?' The crowd was silent.

'Fine…if no ones going to own up to it, then I'll just have to kill you all' The Professor drew his gun from its holster. Scale-face lightly nudged Calliban who hesitantly raised his hand.

'Calliban…it was you?' The Professor asked, flabbergasted. Calliban nodded slowly, looking around at the other evil villains.

'I am sorry you did that Calliban…but I do admire your honesty' Professor smiled charmingly, and Calliban did the same, wiping the sweat off his forehead 'I really do…it's quite touching'

BANG

'Bastard' The Professor said 'Tell people about my hair spray will you, well now you're dead!...ha!'

'Professor…Calliban didn't tell Scott about your hair spray...' said a little voice from the middle of the crowd 'It was m-'

BANG

'No interruptions! Evan, go check on our prisoners' Evan nodded and walked over to a locked door. He drew a key from his pocket and opened the door grandly. In the corner, tied to a drainpipe, were Gambit, Sabretooth, Pyro, Colossus and Danielle.

'How you doing dudes?' Evan asked waving a gun around his prisoners faces 'Hope you're comfortable'

'You'll never get away with this!' Danielle shouted

'Oh, on the contrary, I already have!' Evan said, laughing loudly.

'What are you doing this for Daniel?' Gambit asked, trying to reason with him.

'My name is Evan'

'Evan, Daniel…it's the same thing in the end' Gambit shrugged as best he could 'I'll call you Daniel'

'Isn't your surname Daniel?' Pyro asked.

'No, it's Daniels, with an S' Evan explained 'I had a friend called Daniel at my old school…he was a jerk'

'Why?' Sabretooth asked 'Did he steal your lunch? Or did he shoot your soup?' Sabretooth glared meanly at Danielle, who sighed loudly.

'Are you still going on about that?' Danielle argued back 'I said I'm sorry about a thousand times'

'Make it a thousand and one and I'll forgive you' Sabretooth said grumpily.

'Go on, I hate to see friends fight' Evan said, urging Danielle on.

'Oh…' Danielle contemplated 'Alright. Sabretooth…I'm sorry' they both desperately tried to hug each other.

'Hey Evan, do you think you could free us?' Danielle said 'Just for a second so we could hug each other'

'Oh I don't know, the Professor said to release the prisoners… especially if they want to hug each other ' Evan glanced at the open door 'Okay, just for a second, I don't see any harm' Evan bent down and undid the ropes wrapped around the hostages; he dumped the rope on the floor and smiled proudly.

'There you go, now hug and make up'

CRASH

Down came Gambit's staff on Evan's head, down fell poor naïve Evan to the cold floor. They tied him up loosely and continued their discussion.

'Okay, now…lets escape through the window' Pyro said 'we could get away before they even notice we're gone'

'Duh…that's the whole purpose of escaping at all' Danielle said 'But what about Logan and Scott? We've got to save them!'

'Yeah we will' Colossus said.

'But we don't know where they are' She explained 'We need to find out where they're being kept'

'Hey I have an idea!'

_Minutes later…_

'You look stupid' Danielle explained

'Good' Gambit said, in Evan's lavender shirt and green shorts 'It's the perfect disguise'

'You look nothing like him' Pyro said 'You're far to tall for one thing'

'Plus he's not black' Colossus added 'Why doesn't she dress up Evan' He pointed at Danielle.

'I'm an Indian…and a girl'

'So?' Pyro said 'Hopefully the professor won't notice'

'Hopefully yes, but the chances of that happening?'

'Listen, I know this guy, he's not to smart' Pyro said.

'Isn't he psychic?'

'…yes' he answered hesitantly.

'Then…what if he knows we're gonna do this already?' Collossus asked.

'Then we're screwed' Pyro said.

'But if he does, then why hasn't he stopped us already?' Sabretooth asked.

'Then we're in luck' Pyro answered.

'But what if he's waiting for us just outside the door?' Gambit asked.

'Then…we should leave through the window' Pyro answered, yet again.

'But what if he knows we're gonna leave through the window so he's planned an ambush for us just outside the window?' Danielle asked.

'Then we'll go through the door'

'But what if-'

'Okay…here's the plan, we split up, one group of three, one group of two' Pyro explained.

'Correction' said a muffled English accent from the small wardrobe 'two groups of three' he said, opening the door, it was Major Romy, his cane broken, his coat ripped to peaces. His hat had most probably been lost when he fell out the window and his beard and moustache were filthy and messy.

'Who the hell are you?' Gambit asked, a skeptical eyebrow raised.

'I'm-'

'Major Romy?' Danielle asked, stepping closer.

'Danielle? Is it really you?' he stepped closer himself.

'Oh my god! I thought you'd been killed' She squealed. 'What happened to you, why didn't you call me, man?'

'I'm sorry, it's just, after the war, everyone thought I was dead' Romy started 'I thought I should take advantage of the situation, so I decided to start following the actions of a criminal that piqued my interests'

'Who was it?' Gambit asked.

'One Chester Griffin'

'Chester?' Danielle said 'Chester's only four years old, this was over twenty--'

'Chester may look like a little, innocent, sickening boy. But he's not. He is actually four hundred years old, and is an alien from another planet. He uses that disguise because no one would suspect him otherwise'

'What exactly did he do?' Danielle asked 'I mean, he was a little irritating, but he didn't exactly scream 'alien villain''

'Do they ever?' Romy asked 'Hardly anyone looks like an alien being, but yet again, every other day, attacks from mars, invasions from 'Shi'ar''

'Where's that?' Sabretooth asked.

'Oh it's this ghastly little planet about six hundred thousand light years away' Romy said easily 'It's Chester's home planet'

'Hang on, Hang on!' Pyro said 'I've got a few dozen question to ask you'

'Go ahead'

'One: How do you and Doris over there know each other? Two: If it was over twenty years ago, how come you, Doris, still look thirteen. Three: Who's Chester?

Four: What the hell is going on?'

'All good questions. Me and Danielle first met back in '86 there was a private war going on between mutant kind and aliens from outer space. I am not a mutant as such, but I support them every step of the way. Danielle was in my regiment, and grew to be close friends' Romy looked at Danielle 'Want to tell them why you look so young?'

'I have a mutant ability, much like Wolverine's. I age very slowly, as well as create people's worst nightmares. I am actually 38' Danielle looked around the room, at all the shocked faces 'And Chester is an alien apparently, in the form of a little boy. And we're having an all out war against Professor Xavier and his army of killers'

'Oh' Gambit said 'Everything is so clear now, it's all so simple when you point out the damn obvious!' He screamed.

'Who's Chester again?' Colossus asked.

'So…that really doesn't answer the question of, how we're gonna get out of here' Pyro said.

'That's doesn't matter' Romy said 'I got in through a hidden passageway in the wardrobe'

'Hey, that's convenient' Sabretooth said happily.

They left through the passageway silently.

_At the bathroom…_

'Wait a minute…do they plan on not feeding us?' Logan asked suddenly.

'Yeah…he said on the tape that if we don't get free by twelve the door will be bolted shut, and we can starve to death' Scott said grimly.

'I don't remember the bolted shut thing' Wolverine added.

'I know…I put that bit in myself'

'So let me get this straight… The Professor only shot the people he shot because it was all part of his master plan of killing everybody'

'Yeah…weird huh?' Scott said 'He even blew up his own house'

'Yeah…that is a little weird'

'Logan…can you feel your gut start to eat itself?'

'No'

'It's only me then'

'We've only been here for half an hour, Cyke, I think you should calm down a bit' Logan said 'I mean take a ticket from me, I'm calm as calm can be'

'HEEEEEEELP!!!!!!!!' Scott screamed at the camera.

'We could sing a song… it makes the time fly by quicker' Logan smiled.

'You forget… I _can_ die…unlike you, Mr. 'look at me, I'm so cool, the movies are all based on me, I have several of my own comic series and completely dominate every single part of the X-men franchise…''

'… go to that parallel universe again, Scott?'

'Yeh… I'm getting kinda scared now'

Logan scanned the room… he couldn't see any other devices or anything, so once again he slumped down on the floor, but across the room, Scott was smiling proudly.

'Guess what I just found' he asked Logan, his hands behind his back.

'What… a key?'

'Nope'

'Some sort of escape device?'

'Nope'

'… Another tape?'

'Yep' Scott took the miniature tape and slotted it into the tape player; the place erupted in sound again.

'Hello boys, made yourselves comfortable? I hope so, because one of you especially is in for a long stay. The man in the centre of the room met with a very unhealthy dose of poison…then I shot him. I hope I don't have to do it to the both of you. So let's turn this into a gladiators ring…'

'Oh my GOD!... He's gonna release lions in here!' Scott screamed

'Shhh' Logan said.

'…If one of you can successfully kill the other… then the survivor will go free, and live, prosper…then die. But the question is… are either of you willing to go that far, or will you both decide to starve. TTFN'

'Why does he keep saying that… it just completely ruins the mood' Logan said simply shaking his head, meanwhile Scott had loaded the gun and was aiming at Logan.

'Scott…what the hell are you doing?'

'I'm going crazy… can't you see… I'm gone off the wall, dived into the sea of off the wall-ness, in fact I am so off the wall I've just bounced off the opposite one…!!!'

'…What are you talking about?'

'Die!!!!' Scott shot three times, one hit the bathtub, one hit the lampshade, and the other hit wolverine's shoulder, which immediately healed of course.

'Dude… that was sad' Logan said, while Scott started crying on the floor.

'I can't do it… I can't kill a man…'

'You still tried to… I could turn you in for attempted murder!' Logan shouted.

'Will you?'

'Nah…'

'Good' Scott said quietly before humming a tune, which was so sad, it, would make the hardest of hearts melt.

'Scott… whatever the hell you do, don't start singing the words-' Logan was cut off by a sudden burst of noise.

'You're beautiful!

You're beautiful!

You're beautiful it's true…

I saw your face… in a crowed place,

And I don't know what to do,

Cause I'll never be with you…'

'What was that, man?' Logan asked; his fingers in his ears. Before Scott could answer there was a muffled whimpering sound coming from the speakers.

'Quiet… do you hear that?' Scott asked. Logan took the fingers out of his ears and listened carefully, the moaning was still there. 'It's the Professor… I wooed him into tears'

'Nearly did the same to me, man' Logan said. 'Anyway keep singing, maybe if you make him revel in emotion enough he'll let us go'

'Uh okay um… My life is brilliant;

My life brilliant,

My love is pure.

I saw an angel,

Of that I'm sure She

Smiled at me on the subway  
She was with another man.  
But I won't lose no sleep on that,  
'Cause I've got a plan.'

_The Professor's evil hideout…_

The camera was focused on Scott, singing his heart out, meanwhile the Professor was crying like a little girl, his henchman behind him smiling at each other with tears in their eyes. Even Evan in the next room who was still half unconscious was crying.

'I love you Calisto' said one of the morlocks

'I love you too, Caliban' she answered back.

'I'm Façade…'

'It doesn't matter…' and they hugged each other with the passion and soul of many before them… that doesn't make any sense but it sounds romantically profound.

'_You're beautiful!_

_You're beautiful!_

_You're beautiful it's true,_

_I saw your face_

_In a crowded place_

_And I don't know what to do_

_Cause I'll never be with you'_

In the underground passage way, Romy, Danielle, Gambit, Sabretooth, Colossus and Pyro had also been wooed into tears, and were currently sitting still in the passage and were having a little moment.

'Romy, how come you never called me?' Danielle asked.

'I couldn't face the humiliation… it was wrong of me' he looked at her again 'will you ever forgive me?'

'Of course I will' and they embraced one another… with a friendship that will last forever, till the stars themselves pluck it from the vine of the roses of…friendship… I'm getting pretty good at this poetic stuff.

'I miss Magneto' Pyro said, in Sabretooth's embrace.

'We all do, matchstick, we all do' and they sobbed.

'My Cherie… why, why!?' Gambit screamed at the ceiling 'Couldn't some other person have been blown up instead?'

'I share your loss…' Romy said 'I once had a southern girlfriend, from Mississippi I think, she got in this group called the Z-Force, they all lived happily in this mansion, until one day the owner of the mansion blew it up, and Thief, that was her code name, and this other girl called Jane were inside, the only survivor was this guy called Steven Sinclair, who told me while we infiltrated my old boss's hideout-'

'That's nothing like what I'm going through, leave me with my grief!' he shouted back. 'I just miss her so much, dammit' and they both hugged.

'_Yes, she caught my eye,  
As we walked on by.  
She could see from my face that I was,  
Fiddle-sticking high,  
And I don't think that I'll see her again,  
But we shared a moment that will last 'till the_

_End'._

And up in heaven, everyone who had died during the course of the action. Smiled at each other, and gazed down at Scott singing, with tears in their eyes.

'I wish Forge was dead to see this…' Kitty said gazing down at the truly sad sight.

'I am'

'FORGE??' Said, Kitty, Ray, Bobby, Jamie, Amara, Hank, the pizza guy, Rahne, Roberto, Jubilee, Sam, Storm, Kurt, Jean, Rogue, Magneto, Caliban and Mrs Rivers… I think that's everybody.

'Yep… I slipped over and fell into a river' he explained.

'So… you drowned?' Jean asked, her halo shining brightly.

'Nah… I died in much less humane way than that' he cleared his throat 'I was rescued by the Professor and then he stole my clothes, hung me naked outside for five minutes, then shot me'

'Man… now zhere's a vay to go' Kurt said.

'Yep'

'Wait a minute… how about we all try to psychically try to tell Gambit and the others where Logan and Scott are?' Amara suggested.

'That would tie the plot together pretty well, okay here we go' and they all put there fingers to their temples and concentrated.

_Somewhere in the passage…_

'Hey… I think I know where Logan and Scott are' Gambit said.

_Heaven…_

'Well… that took care of that… Now what other plot hole do we have to fix?' Jean took out a list and checked off a category that said 'find Logan and Scott'.

'Uh… Jean, I think it's they're turn' Kitty pointed to a room that had Plot Holes written above it 'They've been waiting a while now'

'Ah yes… the unexplained deaths of the brotherhood...'

_The bathroom…_

'_I saw your face in a crowded place,_

_And I don't know what to do_

_I'll never be with you…_

_La la la la la…'_

'Forget the words?' Logan asked, sitting on the floor looking terribly bored.

'No. That's how it actually goes…'

'No need for sarcasm…'

'I'm not being sarcastic… it goes 'la la la' for a few minutes' Scott explained.

'Man, he is such an un-talented hack…' Logan said. Scott sniffed loudly and looked down in grief.

'Jean loved James Blunt…'

'Jean Jean Jean… what is it with her at the moment?'

'She died'

'Oh yeh'

_Well, that's it for now. Wait until next time, the 'Saw' theme sorta continues but not for long, and a very a strong warning for next time, a major character dies... it might bring tears to some eyes, it's very moving, it's even got me crying._

_Preview_

_'Don't leave us, we need you for this' Scott said, a strain in his voice._

_'I've been dead for a long time now... dead inside' said 'I'm sorry I dragged any of you into this'_

_'We're not' Gambit said 'This is the best thing that has ever happened to us'_

_'Without it, we wouldn't have made friends with you guys' Pyro said._

_'I am glad...' and with that, eyes fluttered closed and they left the pains of the world._

_'Goodbye , you will stay with us for always'_


	6. Death of a Dreamer

_A short chapter this time, it's been a long time since I lasy updated. I had my GCSE's so I was on hiatus for a while... but, I got A for my english litrature and language! So... I'm ready to write again! I also got A in drama... and I also have a pretty good singing voice, I'm 16 and I like nothing more than a summer's night with that special person, single and looking! ... Sorry... I thought this was a dating site for some reason..._

_Meanwhile in the Professor's hideout…_

Pyro's head popped over the top of the professor's toilet, he looked around quickly before clambering out.

"This is a bathroom, is this the right one?" Pyro asked Gambit who climbed out of the toilet also "Gambit?"

"Hmm, it doesn't seem quite right" Gambit said to himself, rubbing his chin "Plus, the fact they're not here also indicates it's not" The rest of the gang clambered out and looked around, the bathroom wasn't particularly big… three cubicles next to each other.

"Can I…help you?" The professor asked, sitting quietly on a toilet reading a paper, his eyes were wide with shock.

"uh…hey professor" Danielle said "How you doing?"

"Okay… I guess" He said slowly, folding his newspaper, not taking his eyes off the intruders "let me just get my…" CLICK, he a drew his gun and pointed it at the group. "Nobody move!" The gang edged into a corner, their hands all up.

"Look out he has a gun!" Colossus said, every one looked at him. The professor reached into his pocket and retrieved a walky talky, he spoke into it.

"We have a code red situation!" The Professor shouted "Infiltration on sector three"

"Sounds more like a cyan code to me" The person on the opposite walky talky answered "How do I even know you're the professor, you could just be some punk kid trying to get some attention" he said.

"This is Charles Xavier! Code Red on sector three,. Get reinforcements!" He shouted into the device "Now!"

"If this was a code red situation, then there would be intruders on the premises. Which to my knowledge, there isn't" the person said.

"I just told you!" the professor screamed "Intruders!!"

"Why should I take your word? I don't even know who this is" He said "I had a friend who worked security night shifts down at the old art gallery, he got shot because there was a 'code red' situation, do you seriously expect me to go all the way down to sector three, call reinforcements that probably won't come, and risk getting shot?"

"It's your job to!"

"What? To get shot?" He asked "Now I believe my job is to protect the establishment from intruders, which there aren't any of. How can I do that if I get shot?"

"There are intruders on sector three!"

"If there _were_ intruders on sector three then the professor would have called me on my transmitter and informed of a 'code red' situation"

"I am the professor!" The professor shrieked.

"Pfft, yer, okay, of all the people in the world this just _happens _to be the professor and there just _happens _to be a 'code red' situation on _this _establishment" he said "That's quite some coincidence there, you punk kid!" An alarm started beeping loudly and the backup red lights flashed on,

_Code red on sector three code red on sector three_

"Yer yer, like I'm gonna believe you" He said "If there's so much of an emergency then why can't I see you, huh?" he said to the flashing light "Yer, I had a friend who worked security night shifts down at the old art gall - "

The professor threw the transmitter on the floor.

"I don't need his help to-" he looked up just to see the toilet flush and all the people gone "Sugar"

_In the sewers…_

"This place seems pretty quiet since the morlocks moved out" Gambit said "I wonder how much they're being paid?" Gambit looked into space for a moment, picturing a bunch of morlocks swimming in caviar.

"Gambit!" Romy said

"…cool…"

"Gambit!" He snapped to attention "Keep up, we need to hurry, probably the whole place is searching for us now!"

"And it's all your fault!" Sabretooth nudged Pyro with his elbow "We all said 'that cant be the right toilet' and did you listen?"

"Yes… then we went to the next one, the one that had the professor in it" Pyro nudged sabretooth back "So don't blame me"

"John" Romy said, stopping in his tracks "Shut up, what do you think that is?" He pointed to a large metal door that had 'keep out' in large red letters painted on it.

"Looks like a large metal door with the words 'keep out' painted on it in large red letters" Danielle said " Should I shoot it?" She loaded her gun.

"How about we open it first… otherwise we could be in that situation again…you know, back in eighty six" Romy said, putting his hand of Danielle's shoulder.

"Ahh yes…"

"What happened in eighty six?" Gambit said intensely.

"I shot a door…" Danielle and Romy both removed their hats sombrely.

_The professor's Hideout…_

The professor was lazing by his pool in his Hawaiian shirt, his shades on and his hands behind his head, a figure walked in through beaded curtains.

"More juice, you sexy bald man, you?" Jennifer Jason Leigh asked wearing a French maids outfit and holding a jug of grape juice in both hands, she had grapes in her hair and soothing music was playing from somewhere.

"Why yes, Jennifer, I believe I will" The professor said "And don't hold back this time, I want it full to the brim and bursting with flavour!" He said, drooling. Jennifer walked into the kitchen through the bead curtains.

"Professor money money money, professor money, money" Logan said, sitting on the edge of the pool, his bare feet in the water.

"I couldn't agree with you more, Logan" The Professor said, his fingers together "I couldn't agree with you more"

"Professor money money, professor money!" Logan said, louder and much more desperate "Professor money money!"

"Yes yes, Logan, I do have a mighty fine singing voice" The professor said, raising his head as Jennifer Jason Leigh came back and a large glass of juice "Ah, Jennifer, have you read the headline?" The professor passed her a newspaper, the headline read 'Professor Kills everyone' in large black letters.

"Oh, well done, honey" Jennifer Jason Leigh stripped off her maids outfit, underneath was a beautiful red dress, she helped the professor up who was now wearing a tuxedo and top hat, he did a large twirl on his toes before beginning to dance with Jennifer, loud tango music came from nowhere, they were dancing like crazy.

"Professor!" Logan screamed "Money, Professor, money money!!!" Logan screamed, pointing to the pool water that turning into blood "Proooofessoooooor!!!!"

"Oh my god!" The professor said "That is quite worrying, wouldn't you say so Jennifer?" He turned back to Jennifer Jason Leigh, who also slowly rotting in his arms.

"I will always love you, Charles" She said and she turned into dust in his arms.

"No! Jennifer! Damn you, Dr. Octopus, damn you to hell!"

_The Professor's Real Hideout…_

"Wah, wah!!?" The professor looked around, then frowned "Oh…One day" He said, and went back to sleep.

_Scott and Logan…_

"- so after that, I said to her 'if you ever need a shoulder to cry on, come see me' and then… I never saw her again" Logan said "To think what my life would be like if I didn't cut her arms off…"

"That, that was… that was a horrible story" Scott said, close to crying "I mean, I mean… That, god, I mean that was… god, you're a sick man. No wonder you're so troubled…"

"Don't you find it kind of romantic-"

"No! No I don't find it romantic… I mean, seriously. Man, god!" Scott rubbed his hair "I mean, man, I don't even feel safe around you, man"

_Heaven…_

"Jean!" Kitty shouted, looking over a nice fluffy, stereotypical cloud "Everything's going to hell! Nothing is getting resolved, in the sewer they're mourning a some sort of…door, the professor is just dreaming about Jennifer Jason Leigh and Logan is sickening Scott to his stomach in that public bathroom"

"Hmm, interesting" Jean said " What it got to do with me?"

"Well, I just thought you'd be in charge of this situation" Kitty said "Being the girlfriend of Scott and all"

"I got blown up, you bitch, I don't give a rats ass what happens to anyone. I didn't do anything this entire story then I get blown up, and what has it got to do with you?" Jean said "So, why don't you display you're little girl cleavage to Lance and Kurt you whore"

"Hey!" Kitty shouted "I got killed way before you, I got shot before the writer even knew what this fic was about"

"Oh, really, is that right?" Jean asked "And, uh, me getting blown up, uh, that doesn't have anything to do with you does it… you fucker"

"Hey hey! PG – 13!"

"… I'm sorry"

_Meanwhile in the sewers…_

Colossus had opened the door…

"Well, zhere's nothing in zhere" He said, closing it quickly, his back to it "We should probably move on now"

"Help you Russian bastard!" Scott screamed from the other side of the door.

"We have money!"

"Colossus, that sounds like them, move out the way" Danielle said.

"…hmm, nah" He said, shaking his head "Lets go over zhere"

"Colossus, what gotten into you?" Pyro asked "You're acting like a traitor…what are you doing?"

"I think you pretty much answered your own question there, old boy" Romy said, drawing a gun "Come Colossus, come to my side and be evil with me!"

"No!" Danielle screamed.

"How could you?" Gambit asked "We trusted you!"

"Very foolish, very foolish indeed" Romy said.

"Yes, very foolish" Colossus said.

"Quiet, worm!" Romy said, slapping him across the head with the back of his hand "Yes, my little group. Ever since the first day, when my master shot that annoying girl, Kitty, we have been setup to try and stop you"

"But, you said your enemy was Chester, but if he's working for the professor-" Danielle gasped "No!"

"That's right!" Romy shouted and pressed a large button on the collar of his coat, he glowed with a bright, blinding light as he transformed into a little boy, by the name of Chester "Poor old Romy died in that fall we took at the Professor's old mansion, allowing me to take his form. I used this identity to go into the mansion and set the bomb that Calisto had set"

"Oh" Danielle said "I just thought you were working with him, but it seems a much sillier, much less likely scenario that no one could possible have guessed has taken place instead"

"Yep" Chester said "Now, if you don't mind all backing into the room behind you, me and my metal friend here will be on our merry-making way"

"You'll never get away with this!" Gambit said, like a girl.

"Oh! Won't I?"

"No!"

"… Just get into the room" Colossus opened the door and pushed the group into the room, in the two corners were Scott and Logan, who were slightly shocked at the entry of their friends, Chester stepped into the room pointing the gun at his enemies.

"Now comes the time where I leave you… Have a nice life, fellows" Chester was just about to leave when.

"Hey, you four year old moron!" Logan shouted.

"What?" Chester asked "What did you call me?"

"You heard me you little boy you, you four year old!" Logan taunted him back into the room.

"I am four and three quarters!" Chester yelled holding out his gun at Logan.

"Now!" Logan shouted. Scott slammed the door shut and welded the lock in place, locking Colossus out of the room. Chester turned around and was blasted across the room, by Scott.

BANG BANG

"Master, speak to me" Came Colossus' voice outside, hammering his metal hands on the door "Are you dead?"

"Go and get help, worm!" Chester shouted "And as for you!" he said pointing at Scott "You'll pay for that, you all will HA HA HA!" He pressed another button on his collar and he changed once again…into a demon, with six arms, sharp claws on each one.

"Oh, fiddle-sticks"

He shot randomly into the air before running towards Scott, Danielle fired her shotgun at Chesters head, making him scream in pain, he turned around and struck at her, making her fly across the room and smashing into the rear mirrors.

"Hey, Cajun" Logan said "Charge one of the links in my chains" Gambit nodded and rolled over to Logan in a very melodramatic style, he kinetically charged one the links in Logan's chains, making it explode and making Logan free. Sabretooth was keeping the demon busy while pyro was jumping up and down.

"ohmygod ohmygod ohmygod!" Pyro said quickly. Logan ripped one of pyro's gas tanks off his back and threw it into the mouth of the demon.

"Danielle!" Sabretooth screamed "Fire!" Danielle sat up slowly, and gasped in pain, she picked up her gun and closed one eye, she fired once and missed.

"Danielle, hurry!" Scott screamed, she fired again and hit it's arm, it turned towards her and began to charge.

"Danielle!!!"

"Smile you son of a bi--"

BANG KRAKAKOOM!

Bits of demon everywhere. Through the screaming and rejoicing, no one noticed the injured Danielle in the corner.

"Uuugh" She said.

"Doris?" Scott asked, running over and kneeling beside her "You okay?"

"I… I think I'm dying" She said, she had a large gash in her side that was bleeding a lot.

"Don't leave us yet, we need you!" Scott said a strain in his voice.

"I've been dead along time now…dead inside" Danielle said "I'm sorry I dragged all of you into this"

"Are you kidding, minus the nasty parts this has been the best thing that has happened to us" Gambit said.

"Without this, I never would have met you" Scott said.

"I think you should say goodbye to another love interest, Scott" Danielle said.

"What are you saying?" Scott asked, holding her hand.

"I love y—uuuuhhh" Hey eyes fluttered closed, and her grip went loose.

"I love you too…" Scott said, "……Danielle"

"What did I miss?" Sabretooth asked, flushing the toilet and pulling up his pants "Ohhhh… damn"

_Danielle is dead... I warned you. I find it quite upsetting, plus, I now think that Scott and Danielle would make an adorable couple! Yay! Though, it's never gonna happen. Next chapter is a secret...because now there are only two more chapters left and the ending...lets just say the ending isn't gonna be expected._


	7. An Animal Can't be Tamed

_Time is running out! I swore to myself I would finish this damn thing before college, and man, I only have about four weeks. Anyway, a little twist in this part, a lot of deaths, a lot of tears. Luvs!_

"We have to keep going, Scott" Logan said, Scott was slowing down and was now holding the group back "We have to find the Professor and stop him, once and for all!"

"I just realised something" Scott said sadly.

"What is it man…?" Logan asked "You can tell me"

"Since the beginning of this whole thing" Scott said, close to tears "Something has been bugging me through the entire situation"

"I know what you mean"

"No" Scott looked up "You don't"

"Wha-"

"My underpants" Scott said, worriedly "I'm not wearing any"

"Um, oh, uh" Logan looked around for a second "Uh, tut, um. Let's get moving, then, I guess"

"No, man" Scott said loudly "This isn't one of those situations you can just ignore until it goes away, like parking tickets, birthdays and Evan. This is a real problem, and we have to face it. Now what are we gonna do about it!?" Scott screamed.

"Scott, you're acting crazy" Logan said "I know Danielle's death has affected you-"

"Who?" Scott asked.

"Danielle, she died not two hours ago" Logan said.

"Oh yeah… her" Scott said "Meh"

"You cried, mate" Pyro said "You're in so much denial right now it's ridiculous"

"No I'm not" Scott said "And I didn't cry, I was adding dramatic tension to a dry and unemotional scene"

"You cried" Logan said.

"I was adding. Dramatic. Tension." Scott said slowly "I didn't even cry when Jean died, do you think I would even notice if Doris died?"

"She did"

"Oh yeh" Scott said "I'll remember this time"

"Lets go" Logan said, and they kept on moving.

_The Professor's Secret Hideout…_

"She's dead, sir" Said a mysterious voice through an electronic device "They're still heading your way, as planned"

"Excellent, thank you, pet" The professor said "Move along now, before you get noticed"

"Sir" Colossus said from the doorway "Not only is the girl dead, though it looks like Chester is dead as well"

"Damn!" The Professor shouted "I need a moment to think, leave me" The professor pulled a lever that opened a trap door underneath Colossus, who fell screaming into a cave below.

"Was that really necessary, dude?" Evan asked "Is he okay?"

"Yeah, he's fine" The Professor nodded "Spyke, you're my most loyal and trustworthy minion. I want you to separate the group"

"Yes sir" Evan said "How?"

"Use you're wit and knowledge of the underground sewers. The Morlocks will aid you, I wish Logan and Sabretooth to be lead to me personally, Sabretooth's strength is mighty but he is weak on his own. Pyro and Gambit shall be directed to the cage of oblivion!"

"The cage of oblivion is being painted" Evan said.

"Is it a nice colour?"

"Yes sir. Maroon"

"Hmm" The Professor contemplated "Take them to the cage of lesser oblivion"

"Sir" Evan said "You just made that up"

"We don't have a cage of lesser oblivion?"

"No"

"Then where are the prisoners supposed to go while the cage of oblivion is being painted?" The Professor thought again "Just, uh. Hmm. Just leave them alone then"

"Yes sir" Evan said, making notes in his little book "And what about Scott? Cyclops?"

"Take him down…to the torture room"

"Yes sir…"

"Now leave me" The Professor pulled another lever and another trap door opened under Evan…he fell.

_The Sewers…_

"The Professor's instructions were clear" Evan said "Calisto, go through that tunnel there, you should be able to cut them off before they reach The Room of Endless Dreams. And-" Evan looked behind him to realise he wasn't talking to anyone.

"Awww, shit"

_The Entrance to The Room of Endless Dreams…_

"Last time there was a giant door like this… one if us got killed" Gambit said, looking up in awe at the rusty steel door. "Let's go in!" He said excitedly.

"I don't know, this could be the entrance to the Professor's Hideout, but it could also be a trap we have to remember that this guy is smart" Logan said, sniffing the air, then once again realizing he didn't have a super smelling ability.

"I suggest we split up" Logan said "It might be quicker if we search in two different directions"

"Agreed" Pyro said, everyone looked at him "What? I haven't said anything of relevance in AGES!"

"Okay, me and Sabretooth will backtrack and go down that other tunnel we saw" Logan looked at Sabretooth who nodded in agreement "Gambit, Pyro and Cyclops you go on through The Room of Endless Dreams"

"The what?" Scott asked "The what of endless what's?"

"Endless Dreams… uh, look it says it on the wall right there" Logan pointed to the sign that was next to the door, it did indeed say The Room of Endless Dreams, and it had a large arrow pointing to the door. Gambit and Pyro nodded at the plan and they went their separate ways. Scott shot a hole through the metal door, on the inside was fog, a lot of fog; it was oozing out of the hole that was just made.

"That rather odd" Pyro said to himself.

"Endless dreams… what do you think that means?" Gambit asked, he breathed in the thick fog, in his nostrils the feeling of warmth and dancing flowed through his brain.

"I don't think we should go in there" Scott said "I think it might be a trap… plus, Gambit's singing to himself"

"Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens-"

"Oh, no, he does this from time to time" Pyro slapped Gambit across the face, Gambit jumped back to attention and looked serious again.

"Sorry about that" He said

_Evan…_

"Okay, this time! This time I did it right!" Evan said, the army of morlocks behind him "Now, Calisto-"

"Evan!" Calisto shouted "The doors are closing!" She pointed to the door metal doors on either end of the tunnel. They were closing rapidly and there was no other escape.

"Professor!" Evan screamed into his walky-talky "Something not going to plan"

The Professor laughed.

"Evan Daniels" The Professor chuckled back to him "Would you please recite the plan back to me... just so I know you remember it"

"The Plan: Okay" Evan swallowed nervously "The Plan-"

"EVAN!" Calisto shouted, the morlocks all grouped to one side on the sewer "Crocodiles!" Crocodiles were crawling in through panels that opened on the walls.

"Professor, the plan was to kill everybody" Evan said hurriedly "And that's what I'm helping you doing…killing Scott and Gambit and that lot!"

"Evan, my plan is to kill _everybody _including you… and your precious morlocks" The Professor laughed "TTFE … tah tah for ever!"

"No!" Evan screamed as Scale-face got overcome by the giant reptiles "You've said it enough yourself… I'm a nobody!" But it was too late; the professor had already turned off his walky-talky. Evan took Calisto's hand and gulped.

"Just so you know, baby" Evan said "I always-" Evan realised that Calisto's body was gone and was indeed holding only her hand.

"Awwhh, man, that's nasty" Evan grimaced "AHHHHG!"

_Sometime later: Sabretooth and Logan…_

"What the hell?" Sabretooth said picking up a pair of plain white boxer shorts that were floating in the water.

"Hmm" Logan said "Never mind"

"Through this time we've spent together" Sabretooth wiped away a tear "I want to say sorry for all the horrible things that I've done to you"

"Hey man" Logan said "I appreciate that, but now's not the time okay"

"I just wanted to say it" Sabretooth wiped away another tear "There might not be another chance, y'know?"

"I know what you mean" Logan said, they stopped as they reached a small cage in the sewer "I wonder how Chester had us fooled for so long"

"Yeah, I mean-" Sabretooth looked up suddenly, a look of realisation on his face "How did you know-"

"Know what?" Logan asked.

"My minds gone blank, who was Chester pretending to be again?" Sabretooth looked scared "It was…oh what was his name"

"Romy" Logan said

"Yeh…hey, now, uh, how did you know that the room back there was called the room of endless dreams?" Sabretooth asked,

"Uh, no reason really"

"I see" Sabretooth began to run away, real fast.

"Where are you going?" Logan shouted after him.

"Yes Victor where are you going?" The Professor said, Sabretooth stopped abruptly in front of his chair. The Professor had his gun drawn. "Victor… what are you doing here all alone?"

"That gun won't kill me" Sabretooth snarled "I will not be taken down… I lost a can of soup for this mission for crying out loud!"

"Ah, yes" The Professor smiled "You're far too strong for these pathetic bullets"

"Why don't you use your powers? Crush my brain or something…?" Sabretooth backed off a little "A gun seems so…"

"Simple?" The Professor asked "But it works… I don't know why more super villains use them really, instead of using this new state of the art laser weaponry, which always breaks or malfunctions or get reflected into their eyes so they're blind and then they have to perfect there evil ways so they can do evil deeds and still have no vision"

"What's this about?" Sabretooth asked.

"The Blind-Evildoer" The professor smiled and held up a comic book "He's my newest invention; he's kind of like Daredevil only evil. I plan on financing it when my plan is complete"

"But you're plan… you're plan is to kill everybody" Sabretooth said.

"Yes"

"Then who's gonna read your comic book?" There was a long silence, the professor narrowed his eyes.

"… You win this round" he threw the comic on the floor "But this new round… this one is mine!"

"But your powers!" Sabretooth shouted desperately "Why not use them?"

"…duh, I don't have any" The Professor said.

"But…all those predictions, those minds you read… Cerebro!" Sabretooth asked.

"Thousands and thousands of consecutive lucky guesses" The professor said matter-of-factly "Now prepare to die"

"I've told you… that gun won't kill me" Sabretooth growled, he then felt a hand on his shoulder.

"But these will…"

_SNIKT_

"…Bub" Logan growled and retracted his claws; Sabretooth's body fell to the floor.

"Nice line" The professor nodded and jotted the dialogue onto a sheet of paper. "More material for The Blind-Evildoer"

_Heh, Wolverine's a bad guy... I planned that from the beginning... one of the only things I did plan. Everythuing else. Well, everything else is completely mad eup as I go along. Luvs! Everyone!_


	8. Hope

Last ever chapter… very short this one as well

_Last ever chapter… very short this one as well. I feel quite sad about this, as I've delayed putting this one up cos I don't want to admit its finished… but, its good to move on! It will always be here, picking up the odd reader or two from time to time. _

_And if I make at least one person smile every say… few years? It was all worth it._

"This fog… it's so thick" Gambit squinted "I can't see a damn thing" Gambit walked into a large pillar.

"Careful, mate" Pyro said, placing his hand on gambit's shoulder "I've got a funny feeling that this room isn't quite right"

"What makes you say that?" Cyclops asked.

"This purple fog is very mysterious" Gambit said.

"Yeah, everyone stay close, the last thing we want is to get lost in this place" Pyro took hold of Gambit's hand and then took hold of Scott's "All kinds of nasty creatures could live in this place, like sentinels"

"Sentinels?" Gambit asked, moving closer into the group.

"Yeah, and Morlocks" Pyro said, looking round the increasingly dark room.

"Morlocks?" Scott shivered, and also moved in closer.

"And don't forget Spyke" Pyro said and began to walk in beat "Sentinels"

"Morlocks"

"And Spyke"

"Oh my"

"Sentinels"

"Morlocks"

"And Spyke"

"Oh my"

"Sentinels!"

"Morlocks!"

"And Spyke!"

"OH MY!"

"RAWWWR!" A loud thunderous roar echoed through the dark room "My master requires your heads" Spoke a familiar Russian voice.

"Colossus?" Pyro asked, looking round "Why did ya do it, mate?"

"The pay is fantastic, plus, the insurance deals are great" Colossus said, entering into the light clearly "If I get hurt and it's not my fault, I still get paid while I'm taking time off work to rest"

"That is good" Pyro said "And this deal is for everyone?"

"Everyone the professor hires" He answered.

"Hmm"

"Come on Pyro, lets get out of here" Gambit said, looking at Colossus intensely "He's a bad guy"

"Oh, yeh, that'd right!" Pyro said "Time for some payback!"

"No!" Scott said. "Time to run… all our powers suck"

"Mine don't!" Pyro said.

"But in case you hadn't noticed, dear Wolvie stole your gas canisters when fighting the creepy four year old" Scott said, "Plus, he's a metal giant!"

"Metal" Gambit said "I have an idea"

Gambit ran away.

"Gambit!" Pyro screamed "Come back you wuss!"

_Deep in the bowels of Hell…_

"I'm four and three quarters" Chester said, dancing on hot coals.

"Stop complaining, and dance for me, knave!" The Devil shouted "Evan!"

"Yes sir" Evan said

"Bring me another Pina Colada"

"Right away"

"Good, good!" The Devil said, stroking his hands together.

_The Room of Endless Dream: Gambit…_

"I'm such a coward" Gambit said.

"No you're not" Came a familiar Southern accent.

"It can't be" Gambit said to himself, as he turned around to see Rogue, wearing a beautiful purple dress…and a tiara "Scott told me you died, in that explosion"

"Maybe I did…" Rogue said "But does that make this vision any less of a blessing to you?"

"Yeh"

"Why?"

"Cos, you're like…a zombie or something" Gambit said "I maybe into weird stuff, but I would never go that far… again"

"Shut up and kiss me"

"Hmm, okay" and they kissed, and danced in the fog "This is kinda nice"

"It can always be this way"

"But, my friends, I left them there!" He said, trying to escape Rogue's grasp "I need to help them!"

"They'll be fine" Rogue pulled him back and stroked the back of his head "Shh, shh, shh"

"Rogue"

"Yes, sweetie?"

"… What would you do if I told, that I was a coward" Gambit lifted his head and looked into Rogue's emerald eyes "…I am terrified right now… of what will happen to me, what will happen to my friends, what you… what you really are"

"I am rogue… you're love interest" She said simply "How about another kiss" she leaned into Gambit who pushed her away.

"You have a tiara" Gambit said.

"Yes"

"Why?"

"I'm a Princess now" She said simply.

"Well… that's peculiar" Gambit thought for a moment "…What?"

"I'm a Princess now"

"But… that's just stupid, what are you a princess of?"

"Of?" She asked "Since when did you need a reason or a place to be princess _of_?"

"This is just silly" He said.

"Maybe I'm princess of your heart" She smiled "Maybe I'm princess of this room"

"This isn't real" Gambit said "This is the Room of Endless Dreams… this is my dream…and it will go on forever"

"And?" Rogue asked "Isn't this a good dream?"

"…a very good dream"

"Then why do you want to escape it… and a better question is, how?"

"…Wait, I have plan"

He ran away again.

"Gambit!" Rogue called "Don't you want to be happy? Gambit!?"

"I'm sorry, Rogue…" He told himself, and ran back the way he came.

_The Room of Endless Dreams: Pyro and Cyclops…_

"Come out, come out where ever you are" Colossus shouted, bashing down pillars and he walked down the centre of the room "I'll find you soon… then ill eat your brains" He said, then stopped and looked down. "No, no… that's not too healthy"

"Luckily he's not too smart we should be able to avoid him seeing-" Pyro was interrupted by Colossus picking him up by the neck.

"No too smart huh?" Colossus asked, tightening his grip "Let's see who's not too smart when the gooey stuff inside your skull goes…splat"

"Let him go, you oaf!" Gambit said, jumping from the fog into the limelight "I don't wanna do something I might regret"

"What?" Colossus asked "Like ever calling you an ally"

"No..." Gambit scowled "Like ever calling you a friend" Gambit jumped onto colossus who screamed in anger. Gambit placed his hands over the top of Colossus' head, who by this time had dropped Pyro.

"Get behind a pillar, mate" Pyro told Scott "This is gonna be messy"

"Let go, it burns!" Colossus screamed.

"This is for Rogue and Danielle and Magneto and… and …and-"

"Jean?" Scott said, looking into the fog.

"Yeah and Jean" Gambit pulled his coat over hi face and jumped off Colossus "Everyone down!" he screamed.

"This isn't over GAMBIT!" Colossus screamed before exploding into bits.

"We win!" Pyro jumped up and high fived Gambit, who was covered with… nasty things "Woah… you should have heard yourself man, you were like… this is for Rogue and he was like…woah, get off me, mate and you were like, no way man… then he exploded" Pyro smiled "Wasn't it just like that, Scott?" Pyro turned around "Scott?"

"Hey Cyclops, where are you?" Gambit asked "We killed colossus, and now, we're gonna go find the professor to exact our vengeance"

"Man… what a bitch" Pyro said, folding his arms. They looked around the fog filled room, only to discover one noise.

SNIKT

_The Room of Endless Dreams: Scott…_

"Jean?" Scott asked, following the mysterious figure through the room "jean, I know it's you, I recognize the droopy ass"

_Heaven…_

"You…fucker!" Jean shouted

_The Room of Endless Dreams: Scott…_

"Jean!" he shouted "Where are you leading me?" She stopped at a large metal door, which opened by it's self, as the figure walked through the door, her image disappeared.

"Jean?" He asked, looking round "What's going on?" The room was dark, with only a single red light, illuminating the centre of the room. The door behind him slammed shut, with a noise that echoed throughout the room.

"Is anyone here?" Scott called out "I have to warn you… I can scream pretty loud"

"There'll be no one to hear you" The Professor said, wheeling out of the shadows "The entire population of Bayville is dead"

"What?"

"I killed them..." A gruff voice said in the shadows "I killed them all"

"Oh my god"

"Is this your bounty hunter, Professor?" Scott said "Is this who you get to do all your dirty work?"

"Yes. And so were you for a time" The Professor said "What did you think I needed you for? I needed my enemies destroyed… I am but a weak old man, with no powers of his own. Juggernaut, Mystique, Apocalypse, I needed them dead…and you were the people I needed" The Professor smiled "But not anymore"

"Professor" Scott said "Juggernaut, mystique and Apocalypse aren't dead…"

"What?"

"We didn't kill them… we thought it was against our ethics" Scott said, puzzled.

"Who taught you these 'ethics'?" The Professor asked.

"You did"

"I did?" The Professor thought for a moment "Must have been one of my hangover days"

"Professor, think about this!" Scott shouted, as the shadowed figure came closer.

"Hello, bub" Wolverine said, unleashing his claws.

"Logan?" Scott asked. "Logan! Save me!"

"No can do, Scott" He said "I work for the big man here, as a mercenary"

"Logan!" Scott screamed "This can't be happening! We… you were locked up with me!"

"Staged" The professor laughed "Take him to the torture room" Scott was gagged and tied to a wheeling chair was wheeled onto a middle platform of a giant room, much like Cerebro.

"Professor" Scott said, spitting out the gag "This is Cerebro"

"No, this is my torture room…Cerebro is what I called it when I was 'psychic'" The Professor, turned on a valve and placed a mask over Scott's face "This is going to hurt" The Professor said.

"Professor… please don't do this!" Scott screamed "I was your first student, a natural born leader…that's what you called me" Scott panicked "You bald bastard, let me go… I have money! I have wigs… I know you need wigs"

"Hey bub" Wolverine said, from behind the Professor's chair "I'm gonna be doing the torturing, so, be cool okay?"

"Torture?" Scott's eyes shot wide.

"Time to die, Scott Summers" The Professor chuckled evilly.

"No Professor… it's your turn" Wolverine pushed The Professor's chair off the side of the platform and watched him role round and round the room. "Come on, he has agents all round this building, we gotta get out, and quick" Logan said.

"Logan" Scott said, as he took off the restraints around his wrists "I knew you couldn't have changed that much"

"Hey, Scott" Logan said "I've always got your back"

"Us too!" Said familiar voices from the door way of the room, Gambit and Pyro stood there, smiling "We found an exit this way" Pyro said, and they all ran off in that direction.

They were now standing on a high street where cars rushed by, narrowly missing Scott "I knew it!" Scott said "No one is really dead, Bayville is fine!"

"For now" Logan said "We've gotta leave town, right now!"

BANG

A shot came from nowhere, hitting Logan in the chest.

BANG

Another, and another.

BANG BANG

"Run!" Logan shouted "Bullets can't hurt me! I'll be fine!"

"We better do what he says" Gambit said, hitching a ride from a large truck "Out of town quick!" He said to the driver, who turned around and smiled a sweet smile.

"Where are you boys going?" The Driver was a girl, an English girl who always smiled "Out of town?"

"Right away, if you please!" Scott yelled, looking out the window to see wolverine be hit over and over by a continuing barrage of bullets.

"He'll be fine" Pyro said.

"Call me Hope, by the way" The Driver said "We'll get all of you out of this crummy place in no time"

"Hope?" Scott said "An appropriate name"

"Hey" She said sweetly "I don't know your story… but I know you're too weak"

"…what?" Scott asked, looking around to find that both Gambit and Pyro were now gone.

"You were too weak"

"I was?"

"Oh yes, far too weak…"

_Reality…_

"I didn't think he die so fast" The Professor said "I thought he was stronger than that"

"Aww well" Logan said, stripping off his gloves and placing them on Scott's limp body.

"Gambit and Pyro?" The professor asked, wheeling towards the door.

"Oh, yes, quite dead" Logan said "Want to get tea or something?"

"Of course" The Professor smiled "Perhaps some grape juice, the professor has plenty of money!"

"Professor, money, money professor" Logan laughed, "That's all you ever talk about"

"I could invite Jennifer Jason Leigh round" The mumbled as the two of them walked off, leaving a deadly silence in the torture room, one that could not be broken.

The Professor had succeeded.

_Heaven _

Scott awoke suddenly, as if from a dream. He looked around the cloudy area and smiles as he saw friends and family he thought he had lost. Kitty and Nightcrawler smiling and linking arms with Danielle and Major Romy, the new students, standing proud and saluting him, a tear rolling down Jamie's face, Sabretooth, Gambit and Pyro, holding back there grief and smiling with pride as Scott got up and dusted himself off. Forge standing on his own, cos no one liked him, Magneto, watching from the distance, smiling to himself. And then, as if from a magical wish granted by some sympathetic angel, it was her. Jean Grey, the woman he loved so dearly. Scott smiled and said:

"Jean? Jean, I missed you so much"

Jean Grey stood there, tapping her foot on the soft cloud floor.

"Droopy ass, huh?"

The End?

_Well goodness… it's finally finished._

_I feel a little sad about this actually… I've been doing this fanfic for like, 3 years on and off… hmm. _

_Well, I guess I'll see you guys round. Thanks for reading, please leave a review!_


End file.
